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@Dammit
Chap I used to work for was a charming gentleman- when he chose to split up with his girlfriend in a club, in front of all his and her mates she slapped him.
He slapped her back- as I said, nice chap.
She left in floods of tears, then spotting his car she scratched "WANKER" from the headlights to the tail lights, no panel untouched.
Which was good- but what was even better was that he was the manager of a hire car branch, and he had taken a car (the one that night) that was way above his alloted level.
So he had no way of explaining how it happened, the car got left at the back of the lot for ages, until we ran out of cars to use to go and pick up other hire cars.
In the end we just used to call the car the wanker- as in "you got the keys to the wanker?"
I hope he enjoyed that daily refresh of his shame.