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@Donut
I've accidentally flobbed on myself whilst riding. Pretty embarrassing, all gloopy and hanging from my handlebars. Yeah, yeah, I meant to do that, innit.
I've also been spat on (accidentally a few times by other cyclists as I've overtaken them). The last time I was behind this fat chap who blew snot from both his nostrils, one after the other, but the winter-morning sun was so low in the sky that I saw the entire 'cloud of snot' - which I then rode through. It fell on me as a fine mist.
I had to wash myself with fire to feel clean again.