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@BRM
I apologise for this one.
A man received an unexpected phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend one day, as they were chatting they lost track of time, talking about the wild, romantic nights they used to enjoy together.
The man couldn't believe his luck when she asked if he'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little bit of that old 'magic'.
'Wow!' he said. 'I don't know if I could keep pace with you now. I'm a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me.'
She just giggled and said she was sure he'd 'rise' to the challenge.
'Yeah.' he said. 'Just so long as you don't mind a man with a waistline that's a few inches wider these days!'
She laughed and told him to stop being so silly. She reassured him by saying that tubby bald men were cute, and she was sure he would still be a great lover.
She giggled and said 'Anyway, I've put on a few pounds myself!'
So he told her to f*ck off.