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@General_Lucifer
I was walking to the shops today, just minding my own business, enjoying the weather, when a stunning girl on a fixed gear bike almost ran me over. Long blonde hair, denim shorts, cropped t-shirt. Gorgeous! Well, she apologised, and we got talking. She was curling her hair with one finger, and batting her eyelashes, and I got on to asking her about the bike. It was a custom Mercian, barber's pole stripe in emerald green and crimson with gold pinstriping. She told me how much it cost her. I couldn't believe it! Anyhow, she was asking for my number, but I wasn't really listening. I only had one thin on my mind! I smacked her round the head as hard as I could, snatched her bike, gave her a quick kick in the tits and rode off laughing.
It was only later that I realised she had been hitting on me. How could I have been so blind, so naive?Yet another missed date with destiny. How long would love evade me? I intend to ride around town on that beautiful Mercian, and when I find her, I'm going to ask her if she'd like to go for coffee with me. Would that be too forward of me?