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I'm now on a full-time WFH contract as I have some caring responsibilities. Work have been great about it and my boss literally lets me do what I want hour wise as he knows I don't take the piss, always do my work and request to take on new stuff all the time if things are slow.

Never had a work romance or even considered it. I am still really close friends with a couple of people I worked with 15 years ago. It was a small team and we just got on really well, but not friends with anyone else at other or current work places, even though I like a lot of them. I've always tried to keep work and home separate.

Got a concession a couple of years back to work remotely from abroad from time to time. Employer benefits were loyalty from me (better paid job offers were dismissed), no sickness absence and generally going the extra mile.

I suspect this concession will now be rescinded which is a shame as both parties benefited.

Certainly not digital.

Never had any grief, never got married. Just happy memories.

Oddly, that's how I met most of your girlfriends too. And your Mum.

@dancing james: stop showing off, not everyone can afford a cluster fuck.

My office romances didn't call for frottage in the stationery cupboard, because we socialised a lot outside work. I ended up meeting colleagues' friends. Even went to a couple of weddings. It seemed like normal human behaviour at the time. The only time I troubled HR was company car abuse.

Even went to a couple of weddings.

I was best man at a wedding where one of my mates met his wife at my work drinks (she was friends with one of my colleagues).

Off the top of my head I'd say there's probably been about 20 weddings over the years from people who've met at my office.

hired based on a hybrid work pattern

When I started my current job it was definitely sold to me as hybrid, with an expectation to match our clients - "but they're all hybrid too".

Current client (a bank) has gone from from 2 or 3 days (you choose) to 3 days with one to be a Mon/Fri and all MDs and above to be in 5 days.

It's great. It means we can all go and spend our time on Teams calls surrounded by other people on Teams calls. Even when you're in the office it's pointless not being on a Teams call because you're inevitably going through documents or possibly dialing in someone from another office, probably in another country.

Personally I prefer working in an office, but the negative impact on quality of life, plus the added cost (travel and childcare) when my salary hasn't increased with either inflation or to match any increased days in the office means I'd resist 5 days. To the extent I could.

The client has large numbers in India where you often have large commute times, and Women often have care responsibilities for parents and children. Hybrid working has resulted in a huge shift in their m/f ratio because of hybrid working.

Unfortunately when you've spunked money on new offices and a McKinsey report you need to justify it with bums on seats rather than making a decision based on its merits.

On the personal relationships being an HR nightmare, it is very dependant surely.

A married manager having an affair with one of their reporties is a long way from two young people in different departments dating.

Tonnes of people meet partners through work. I find it weird that people are making it sound weird.

i'm curious about the childcare costs aspect of this - if you are looking after kids at home then you aren't working?

ok if they are ill then you can wfh and still get some stuff done but I don't see how people are simultaneously looking after their kids and being "at work" as a regular thing.

i completely get the flexibility aspect and support that (e.g. some people where I work do pick ups / drop offs and manage their time around that), it's just that surely you still need childcare to effectively wfh?

I love being in the office when there's a reason to.

Some proper blue sky thinking there!

I guess the counter is; why would you want to give employees autonomy or improve their happiness when you could have a busier looking office?

2 kids. One school, one nursery. The days me and my OH are WFH we will do the drop off and start at 9.15 (2 days for me, 3 for them).

This means we don't have to pay for breakfast club for either of them.

Nursery is late pickup, but the one in school will do the after school club. Previously they did some after school club but wfh gave the flex to pick them up so it wasn't required every day. It did mean not doing quite a full day with making dinner and fielding questions, but by 5yo they're pretty self sufficient. And not having the commute makes working later easier if needed. That wasn't 5 days for both of us, but rather 1 day for each of us.

School clubs aren't too expensive. But it does add up and it is out of post tax income. I think wage stagnation plays a factor in this.

Also that’s very FT way of thinking no?

thanks, understood.

to me that's in the "being flexible / reasonable" category but i can see that if your employer insists that you are in the office and / or on line at a set time then it will have an impact.

someone I work with regularly leaves mtgs / the office at 3:15pm to get back to do school pick up but then is regularly working (on line, at home) at 9pm on a friday night.

I think the point is, that if both of us had to be in the office 5 days 0830-1730 then the reality is we would have to have to have breakfast clubs and a childminder, or an au pair (or I might stop working/do a part time temp job).

From a cost perspective that is very different from 4-5 after school clubs, and maybe a couple of breakfast clubs.

From a lifestyle POV it's a fucker. Pre covid I used to do the drop off, with my OH starting early so they could finish work at 4.30 to get back for pickup. We did it. But it was shit. We'd both always be rushing on our commutes and stressing.

Do you measure activity or achievement? I can do the same amount of work as colleagues in less time which suits lazy me working from home. Semi competent colleagues look busy but do less in an office

We'd both always be rushing on our commutes and stressing.

tbf i do remember this from the days when mine were young which was significantly pre covid. i think covid moved the dial on flexibility where i work in a positive way.

Do you measure activity or achievement?

I think we all know what the true answer to this is, don't we.

very FT way of thinking no?

not sure to be honest.

where i work there are lots of people who do safety critical activities or site based technical roles where you have to be where you have to be, and you have to be focussed on what you are doing for the time you are paid to be doing it.

they look at management on zoom calls with their kids running around in the background and basically think "f*** you lot".

i think covid moved the dial on flexibility where i work in a positive way.

I worked at the CPS in the late 2000s and they had an incredibly flexible working environment for the time. Obvs dependent on what you did, but at the time it had one of the highest ratios of female employees in the public sector.

To me it's a progressive move. It allows mothers back to work and helps fathers to be more involved.

To me it's a progressive move.

yeah i agree with all of this, i'm just suggesting there is a balance between what someone is being paid to be doing and everything else people may have going on in their lives.

When I started my current job it was definitely sold to me as hybrid

What did the contract say? Anything else is meaningless.

It's not though is it.

If someone says, "we're pretty relaxed and measure you on performance" and then you start and they're fucking militant and don't let you leave unless it's in your lunch break or for an external meeting then that's not reasonable.

If you're told upfront that you need to be work contactable pretty much all the time to jump advise on deals or be expected to attend calls on the West Coast then you know that, and expect it.

Employment contracts can be changed and there is normally fuck all you can do about it. It doesn't stop it being a dick move or preventing you pushing back.

I’d suggest there’s been a creep for longer hours and more available out of office hours too though… Covid just re addressed this a bit in terms of balance.
If those managers have their holidays interrupted seems ok for the kids to be in the background then….?

If someone tells you one thing, you don't get it in writing and you turn up and find it is different you quit (or find another job) because at that point any trust is lost and it is pointless carrying on.

Employment contracts can be changed and there is normally fuck all you can do about it.

You can not accept it. I've done that. The exec weren't happy. I continued to work under my old contract.