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  • I called the police on a guy waving a gun around outside Iceland. It looked like a Glock. I assume it was a replica but I never found out. He was videoing himself while giving a lecture about weapons to passers by. It went like this: "guns are bad, knives are bad, when you're dead, you're dead, forever. Bang bang!" He pretended to shoot his friend, who fell down. It was early afternoon on a weekday, so the audience were all slack-jawed ladies with shopping trollies, plus me, the busybody grass describing the lecture to the 999 operator. A convoy of gun police showed up very promptly. By then the gun and video camera had been put in a suitcase and the lecturers were getting ready to leave. I pointed out the main man to a very angry, scary officer. There were no preliminaries. Both men were immediately trussed up like chickens. Much aggrieved protestation. The officers didn't want a statement from me. They said the arrests would be dealt with by local officers. Then they drove off to their next appointment. Total time on scene 5 minutes. I never heard any more about it. No idea whether the blokes were charged.

  • When i was about 18, in my childhood home. I was up early-ish, about 6. Looked out the front window and there were loads of armed police creeping through the front garden and outside the low front wall. Turns out that the flat 2 doors down (above a small architecture practice) was a drug dealer's den.

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