Advice on tubular tyres

I'm surprised no-one has reminisced about Wanker Bars. Perhaps their users had too many bangs on the head to be typing in their old age. From https://pezcyclingnews.com/features/equipment-nostalgia-fact-or-fiction/

"if like us you rode cheapo Barums or the dreaded Wankobar (usually
pronounced Wanker Bar) – the name is for real, Google if you must –
things were different. Both brands came from behind the Iron Curtain,
often via Milk Race team mechanics who looked like they could handle
themselves in a knife fight.

Barums were Czech and were either brilliant – safe, long lasting and
good handling or terrible – sitting crooked on the rim and developing
huge abscesses on the side walls; with nothing in between. Fitting
usually gave you a clue, if you and your buddy ended up covered in rim
cement and sweating like beasts trying to get them on the rim – it
wasn’t a good omen.

Rim cement was from Dunlop, a brown goo which went everywhere,
inevitably including your hair – I’ve never been more happy than when
I discovered double sided tapes for sticking tubular tyres on.
Wenkobars were cheap, looked good with their yellow sidewalls but
often you couldn’t get them straight on the rim no matter what you
did. And if it rained – forget it, they were lethal. Although we did
find out 30 years too late that the problem was that they still had
the talc from the manufacturing moulds on them, that was what made
them so slippy, and all you had to do was give them a good scrub with
a coarse brush and hot, soapy water and they’d be fine. Try telling
that to PEZ pundit, Viktor who crashed twice before he got to the end
of his street the first time he ventured out in the rain on them."