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The more I think about the actual argument here it's full of holes. Your willy presumably got washed when you first appeared on the planet and has been washed a pretty considerable amount since then.
Washing a record once after its been pressed and then occasionally depending on use seems very much like the norm for washing any part of the body including a willy.
I'm with you on washing it every time you play with it though, that does seem unnecessary.
Airhead
salad
I literally couldn’t be arsed with all this.
Cleaning vinyl seems like wiping your knob after pissing. Once things are bit worn out, you still get the problem whatever you do.
I now embrace my pissy willy.