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my uncle (by marriage not blood) was the tightest arsehole you could ever meet, when i was about 10 i sold him my NES and games because I was getting a mega drive and he was too tight to buy my cousins a new console. he paid me a tenner at a time every time i saw him until there was about £40 owing and the cunt magically never had any money on him or would say "well i buy you sweets sometimes don't i" when i told him he owed me money.
anyways he like a ramble (because walking = free) and once while walking along a canal with my two young cousins one of them needed a piss so stepped off the path and found a carrier bag full of rolled up bank notes easily worth a couple of grand.
the kids can't believe their luck. all the shit they've been told they could never afford is actually in reach, but the dad insists they hand it into the police and takes it off them.
apparently "handing it into the police" means spending the entire lot down the pub over the next couple of months, not one penny went into the household nor did my cousins even get a treat out of it.
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HatBeard
owl
I was on a walk with my dad once in Devon I think, and I found a few quid and bits of change on the floor. I was thrilled. Then I found some more and I thought it was christmas. Then I found a fiver and shit went through the roof. I was 6 maybe, this was lots of sweet. I was now running ahead on the path with eyes fixed down, determined to find some more. Low and fucking behold there was £10! I'm basically uncontrollably excited. So many sweets. Keep going - £20!!!! This is the best day of my life. My Dad starts to look a bit uncomfortable. Can I really be allowed to keep all of this? Anyway, I'm screeching along the path looking for more treasure. Only to find a lady's purse. Clearly it had been half falling from her bag, leaving a trail of money and then finally the purse itself hopped out. I have never known a sadness like my Dad telling me we had to put all the money back in the purse and hand it in to the police. Tears for days and I'm not sure I've really got over the grieving for those sweets...