Sort-of memes that are cracking you up at the moment

Or, like the majority of households in Asia, use a rice cooker.

Zojirushi ftw, ftoatmeal as well

Or 1:2 rice boiling rice to water, low heat.

Or just shit loads of water, strain, let it steam off a bit and worry about something else.

At what stage do you take the rice out of the bag though?

Open packet, put in microwave.

How do you hear the snap crackle and pop then?

to bring us back on point

1 Attachment

Next week, couscous.

Not until you get rice right.

pixels

1 Attachment

...

1 Attachment

haha

All my cups are different sizes. Which one should I use? The white one, red one or the stripy one?

Cut the red one, I know that much.

Fucking hell lads. It's one cup of rice to one and half cups of water. Add salt. Bring to boil, stir once, turn heat all the way down with lid on. Leave for ten minutes. Turn off heat, leave to steam for five minutes. Fluff with fork.

Basmati anyway.

May I remind you guys @fizzy.bleach explained the process in great detail three years ago already -

*Everyone else is wrong. Do this:

No pre-soak. No rinse. Put kettle on. Rice in a dry pan. Measure it to the TOP of whatever measuring vessel you're using. Pan should be hot. Add some cloves and cardamom if you like. Also salt. Pretty soon you'll have hot dry rice, salt and spices in a hot pan and a boiled kettle. Now take your measuring vessel and put in 2x the amount of rice BUT ABOUT 1CM SHY OF THE RIM! The water will start bubbling immediately. Lid on and simmer - it should be bubbling nicely but not boiling over and not just farting along - somewhere inbetween. For a small mug of rice (serves 2) and 2 scant mugs of water, this takes me about 7 mins. You can tell when it's up because all the water will be boiled off and the bottom grains of rice will have started to stick to the pan.

At this stage you'll have undercooked rice with the bottom ones starting to stick to the pan. That's fine. Now turn the hob off and leave the rice for SEVEN MINUTES. Fluff up and serve.*

Does it have to be a fork?

Lot's of p0rn people out of work at the moment. Fluffers need jobs too.

Lot's of p0rn people out of work at the moment

I'm an equal opportunities employer, I'll give it a go...

Just boil the rice for ten minutes and strain it ffs
makes literally no difference how much water you use

This.

I don't actually do this anymore for some reason, but love that whenever anyone gives you an easy way of cooking rice it never is.

Lots of rice here ...
https://www.youtube.com/user/cookingwithdog/videos

You guys got any tips for pasta?

20mins on full wack.

Dry in the microwave?

No... you definitely need water in there too.