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  • Quite recently, I'd say within a month, I went into a butcher's in the Scottish Highlands and the butcher was standing astride an electric fire, I said "Is that your Ayshire bacon?" he said "No I spilled gravy on my sporran".

  • It reminds me of a sign I saw in an old fashioned butchers a few years ago: 'Will customers please refrain from leaning on the bacon slicer as we are getting a little behind with our orders'.

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