• My enjoyment of figs, which was considerable, took an irreparable blow after biting into one when in the company of a friend, who had been suffering the shits for the best part of a week, he leaned over and said “I bet that’s exactly what my arse hole looks like”

  • I've not been able to eat peaches since, as a child, watching that scene in the labrynth where Sarah eats a maggoty peach.

  • You may be surprised to learn that figs contain dead wasps
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_fig:

    ... pollinated by a symbiosis with a fig wasp (Blastophaga psenes). The fertilized female wasp enters the fig through the scion, which has a tiny hole in the crown (the ostiole). She crawls on the inflorescence inside the fig and pollinates some of the female flowers. She lays her eggs inside some of the flowers and dies.

    After weeks of development in their galls, the male wasps emerge before females through holes they produce by chewing the galls. The male wasps then fertilize the females by depositing semen in the hole in the gall. The males later return to the females and enlarge the holes to enable the females to emerge.

  • I used to wait tables with a very talented young cricketer. He had a phobia of peaches (the skin, specifically). I used to take full advantage of his instinctive catching reactions by throwing peaches at him across the big dining room and shouting his name. He'd catch them and instantly throw them at the wall while screeching. Hours of fun.

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