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  • Someone once told me that in some quarters, John Bishop is considered a comedian. Not sure how.

  • John Bishop is not a Scouser, he's a wool from Warrington but like that other cunt from Warrington - Mel C, they feel like they have to belong.

    Warrington is a shithole in Cheshire so it's a tough choice 'Do I pretend to be a Scouser or a Manc?'

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