Crap 'Buzzwords'

fucking "sunny trevor"? "crisp susan" " mild jack"?

You haven't got the idea yet. They all have to alliterate. :)

Also, they're proceeding alphabetically, alternating masculine and feminine names, so feminine 'E' will be next. My money's on 'Excitable Edwina'. After that, 'Fulminating Fabrizio' or 'Gale-force Gail' are distinct possibilities.

A man in my office is forever about to "turn the handle on that".

A waterfall arose from the stone as a result of Storm Desmond:

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/video/2015/dec/07/storm-desmond-brings-malham-cove-waterfall-to-life-video

Waterfall is sooooooo outdated now, even the public sector is trying Agile these days.

And outrunning the private sector.
A lot of my clients are financial services and adopt a WAGILE approach (their term), where they can say it is agile and feel edgy but it is nothing of the sort and very much resembles the exact waterfall process they were running 10 years ago.

I heard that one period of inclement weather in Scotland a few years ago was dubbed 'Storm Bawbag'.

[Edit] misread post

^^^ That chap with the escape goat is the pacific kind of person I hate!

'Delta'

I'm sick of hearing the word delta.

Chuck would disagree

The Germans called it Friedhelm:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hurricane_Bawbag

Corporate end-of-the-year "message from the management" best of:

"... continues to make tangible progress..."
"... but we are not yet firing consistently on all cylinders..."
"... we will need this very important element of robustness..."

I don't think this was posted up in here, so here's Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey's memo, where he fired 300 people, edited to remove the jargon:

http://qz.com/522824/jack-dorseys-jargon-free-firing-memo-edited-to-remove-the-jargon/

That is gold.

I seemed to have missed the memo where a Powerpoint presentation can't be called a presentation or a Powerpoint any more. It has to be called a "deck" or a "pack".

fuck off.

Hah! WAC.

Tech

So many adverts at the moment claiming their car/phone/gadget has 'all the best tech'.

I heard this about a week or so ago.

It was uttered by an American.

A little part of me died.

I'll never ceased to be amazed by the way in which people instantly and unquestioningly adopt this weird metaphor-heavy language. Today we had some product training from a(nother) huge US corp. Each slide set out some info about a certain product arranged in three horizontal tiers which they referred to as a 'layer cake'.

Now to me that's amusing but within seconds of being presented with this everyone was calling it a layer cake without a hint of irony, and flinging emails round saying "here are the updated cakes".

WTF?

As a linguist I'm not too stuffy about usage. In fact I find it amazing that we have the capacity to use abstract terms like this so willingly.

because we're herd haminals

Our meeting was to be a "Chinese workshop". They clarified that this meant everyone would get to tell everyone their ideas and no one would question it until the end.

Is this a commonly used term? If someone's idea is shit, wouldn't it be good if you could just stop them bollocking on?

I'm not convinced that real Chinese workshops operate on those principles.

I came across a 'horizontalization' in a document today. Joy.

You should have just kept saying unisex urinals until they all gave up.