On-One Inbred SS Disc Balloonbike

Aren't they just going to ruin (crush/bend) the QR skewer?

In order to pull the wheel forward, you'd have the shear the skewer. That's not too difficult for an M5 threaded bar (you can use single action, rather than compound, bolt croppers) but it's still likely to be beyond your powers unless you use a tiny chainring, especially as there's a load of friction helping to resist the chain tension, not just the shear pin.