Football

The creases would catch the excrement?

Or are you turning into my mother and suggesting if I were to have an accident, the medical staff attending to me would have a low opinion of me if my pants were unironed? I know you're getting on, Clive, but in this day and age I think you'd be thought of as more of a weirdo if you had ironed underpants on.

"Look at this fella's pants, they've been ironed. He looks in his 40s but I bet he's a virgin and still lives with his mum."