Cool Stories Bro

GL would only reach around to get to your wallet I suspect

Subscribed. Moar police stories please!

I can't touch the constable, but I went on holiday, about 200 miles from home, and by chance met my next door neighbours, also on holiday. It was Buxton, Derbyshire, and it was wet. Shit holiday really.

[more of a "cool" story than a cool story. I desperately wanted to blurt it out in the food thread but was able to spare everyone by diverting it here. Also maybe this will bring the thread back to life and remind the constable that it is after new years now so on with the stories.]

A friend, who is Jewish but slightly more observant than me*,on Rosh Hashanah** he accidently ate bacon clam pizza for lunch. True story.

*like he is vaguely atheist not furiously atheist. Also, unlike me, he knows about Jew things/holidays etc that he is supposed to do. He just doesn't do them.

**This is the day that God sits down and checks out your life. If you are being good and observant you get to live for another year otherwise you are written in to the book of death. This is one of the number of ways that the Jewish faith is harsh. It also means, I assume, that anyone who dies is super evil and that old people are all really bad.

Is youre friend still alive, despite not getting to live for another year?

[more of a "cool" story than a cool story. I desperately wanted to blurt it out in the food thread but was able to spare everyone by diverting it here. Also maybe this will bring the thread back to life and remind the constable that it is after new years now so on with the stories.]

A friend, who is Jewish but slightly more observant than me*,on Rosh Hashanah** he accidently ate bacon clam pizza for lunch. True story.

*like he is vaguely atheist not furiously atheist. Also, unlike me, he knows about Jew things/holidays etc that he is supposed to do. He just doesn't do them.

**This is the day that God sits down and checks out your life. If you are being good and observant you get to live for another year otherwise you are written in to the book of death. This is one of the number of ways that the Jewish faith is harsh. It also means, I assume, that anyone who dies is super evil and that old people are all really bad.

I have eaten bacon latkes cooked by an observant jew on a sabbath. It was wrath free.

Latke's.... penny has just dropped!

It's taken me 36 years but still.

Is youre friend still alive, despite not getting to live for another year?

Yeah man, its how we know that He isn't watching us very closely. We also hung out with our friend who had a bald patch in his beard. We live dangerous, on the edge.

^^ Yeah latkes!

The same woman does Latke-palooza every year at New Years. Perfect for soaking up all of the booze. Sooooooooooo tasty.

I basically never knew that half of my family is Jewish. Most of my aunts and one uncle are full Jewish whereas my dad and another aunt are half Jewish or depending on your views, not Jewish at all. None of them are observant or religious for that matter. As far as I know none of my cousins knew that we were Jewish and most certainly none of us ever went to synagogue. There were lots of customs in the family though. Latke's at a certain time of year, avoiding eating milk with meat were only a couple of them. Considering you don't know any different you don't ask, I guess.

Only a few years ago I was having a drink with my old man it religion comes up (he hasn't got any time for it) and tells me in the most casual way* "didn't you knew we are Jewish*"?

Fucking hell dad, no I didn't. If you'd told me than I would have remembered it.

/csb

And yet, people have an ethnicity. Weird, right?

And a culture. Also weird, right?

I was born a snake handler and I'll die a snake handler.

Simpsons quote thread

Moar.

moar!