In the news

thats why they wanted the dungeon and secret hidden room options from the " my underground lair " catalogue
noone can hear you scream from down there

some male tories are gonna get their asses spanked for this cockup

Turkey's joined the EU - how did I miss that?

Eh?

nato ?

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/nov/01/secrets-worlds-happiest-cities-commute-property-prices

http://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/well/2014/03/26/exercising-for-eye-health/

Well at least he replied, shame he didn't proof read it. But it's good he took the time.

Clearly my comments in last weeks Crawley News have caused a lot of controversy ...
Call me a cynic, but I wouldn't be surprised if that's what you were after to gain more publicity. Ok so the specifics of the story might not be accurate, however it's the quotes I found offensive and I see you haven't retracted those comments.

The reason I am against the creation of a food bank at the Town Hall is very simple. The current food banks in the town are not over subscribed so why open another at expenses to tax payers when there is current no need. The only reason I can see for making such a proposal is political gain and such a serious issue shouldn't be used as a political football.
Is food bank use in Crawley on the rise? It certainly is in other areas of the country. Should we not plan for the future, and be prepared rather than await the over-subscription of the existing food banks before acting? If the council were (shock horror) doing something to benefit the people who live in the area solely for political gain, well they've failed because it will actually benefit real people so they might gain politically, but they will gain because they have done something for the people they are supposed to be serving. But you knew that already.

I'm going to be honest again as I never hold back (and wait for this to be taken out of context again) but I am against food banks. We should not need them with the welfare system that we have. Instead of opening more food banks we should be dealing with the reason that people are using them. Getting people back to work, increasing the tax limit to £10,500 are all things that are designed to help those most in need. For those that cannot work we have a benefits officer at the Town Hall who will help and check that you are receiving every you should and that we are doing all we can to help you.
You were so close! We *shouldn't *need food banks, everyone should be able to afford to get by and earn a proper living wage but this isn't the case. You can shut up with your rhetoric about getting people back into work. We have a welfare system for a reason. Some people are unable to work and we, as a modern society, should support them (again with a living wage equivalent).

I offer to sit down with our officers at the Town Hall and help anyone that is currently using food banks to look at your budget and see what can be done to help. People shouldn't need food banks and therefore I want to make sure the council is doing all that it can to have no one using them.
You are just saying people who rely on food banks are simply bad with money. I hope someone will take you up on the offer and show you how wrong you are.

That is why I do not believe we have food poverty in real term in Crawley. I say in real terms as I've seen true poverty in its most horrible form in the developing world on many occasions. Once you have seen that with your own eyes it puts everything else into perspective.
You are talking about abject poverty, which is not the same as relative poverty. But you knew that. We should be helping those people in abject poverty too which is why we have a foreign aid budget.

There should be enough help so that there isn't food poverty and where there is, that needs to be addresses by whatever means possible and that was my point.
I thought there wasn't poverty in Crawley?

I said that of course people are struggling as we in the main all are but that it was hard to argue there was a cost of living crisis when all the restaurants, cinema, bowling alley etc are full on a weekend. It has nothing to do with people coming into Crawley as places like Horsham have the same restaurants plus more. Of course this has been taken massively out of context in a sort of 'let them eat cake' way. Again total rubbish as my point was that things aren't as bad as Labour keep trying to make out.
So because some people are struggling no one should enjoy themselves? Even those people who are struggling shouldn't feel entitled to treat themselves to a meal out after they've saved up especially?

Yes it's tough but things are certainly better than they were 4 years ago!
Then why is food bank usage still on the rise?

Finally I want to address this out of touch nonsense ....
Oh poor you. You aren't getting my sympathy so fuck off. And you're allowed to go out for meals because you work hard for your money but the rest of the proles should be staying at home if there is food poverty? Ok then.

I think he's done more harm than good with his response.

What's with all the top cop's TV and radio interviews this week?

I actually think he's pretty good, at least, he speaks a lot of good sense.

Bernard Hogan-Howe is a fabulous name too.

Turkey's joined the EU - how did I miss that?

This a tip of the iceberg rant not aimed at anybody on here...
The one thing everybody in this (partially thanks to Tayyip) deeply divided country can agree on is; NOBODY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT BEING IN EUROPE. It gets repeatedly brought up and it's really frustrating because it fills the limited UK debate (for such a complicated and important story) with a complete irrelevance. Why don't people care? Well, the secular, Kemalist and left-wing groups are more concerned with the erosion of their rights, corruption and creeping islamisation. The conservative and religious groups (who favour Tayyip) have been unable to give two fucks about being in Europe for over a decade (before is was cool). It's like asking David Moyes who he thinks will win the champions-league... he's got 99 problems but Europe isn't 1.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/smoky-bacon-fire-destroys-13-tonnes-of-crisps-that-were-set-to-be-recycled-as-pig-feed-9224341.html

well at least the tank of sunny d that the pigs drink is ok

hmmm healthy pork

off with her head

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/theroyalfamily/10733477/Twos-a-crowd-in-wedding-wardrobe-faux-pas.html
" It is the type of sartorial solecism to strike dread into the heart of any guest at a wedding. "

yup this is my biggest concern at any wedding i have attended

vive la revolution

It took 2 people to write that horseshit?

i bet they used a thesaurus, a dictionary and the combined total of their grey matter to look up

" sartorial solecism "

i'm surprised they managed to get their noses out of ok, gracia and hello magazines long enough to knock out 400 words

next week they'll be given scissors to use, but only under adult supervision

I think my favourite part is the opinion of the 17 yr old at the end of the article. Even if you cared about the apparent fashion faux pas, why the fuck would you care what he fucking thinks?

"It was a bit surreal"

Surreal -

1. of, pertaining to, or characteristic of surrealism, an artistic and literary style; surrealistic.
   
2. having the disorienting, hallucinatory quality of a dream; unreal; fantastic: surreal complexities of the bureaucracy.
   
   

OR two posh bints wearing the same coat?

I think we should be told

A real time live transmission of some guy cycling through Bergen, Norway.
Just click on the big video thingie at the top of the page. Will last for a few more hours I think. Not really 'news' but...

http://www.nrk.no/hordaland/direkte_-sykkeltur-gjennom-bergen-1.11640301

EDIT: right now he's eating a banana.

here's a story that will rock the uk to it's very core

game changer
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/coughs-the-word-bridge-world-champions-found-guilty-of-cheating-9224319.html

is there no bastion of civilised society left
has absolutely everything gone to the dogs ?

here's a story that will rock the uk to it's very core

game changer
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/coughs-the-word-bridge-world-champions-found-guilty-of-cheating-9224319.html

is there no bastion of civilised society left
has absolutely everything gone to the dogs ?

Yeah, I know, Germans and Americans topping the Bridge champs.. the world as we knew it is over..

here's a story that will rock the uk to it's very core

game changer
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/coughs-the-word-bridge-world-champions-found-guilty-of-cheating-9224319.html

is there no bastion of civilised society left
has absolutely everything gone to the dogs ?

But what a stunningly named reporter!
Loulla-Mae Eleftheriou-Smith

Say that when you're pissed.

do you reckon she married into smith or elefitheriou

Inconclusive....

I reckon she did it by deed poll. that surname is clearly pronounced 'i love aerosmith'

maybe she needed a few more vowels for surname scrabble

My money is on her bringing the Grik surname to the party

Because Louella-Mae is so Grik? That's a Southern thing (Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Tennessee). I bet she was a débutante.