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Ah, the Ikea Toksvig swivel chair. As seen on Peep Show and in two rooms at my place.

Enjoyed the film heaps. Very different to the book, which is a very good read (five handlebars from me anyway).

Ha ha no surprise. Saw trailer and thought WTF there's nothing of substance in this souffle.

Not even up to date movie minima.

The big shouted "OI!!!" is usually the best answer on Oxford Street. Usually freezes the ped so you can dodge them.

And remember kids, if you're caught by plod driving down there you've "got a job in Stratford* Place, officer".

*ninja edited

My go-to is still the old school cotton/vinyl "paperboy" bag I got for courier work yonks ago. Tough, light, simple (one strap, one flap - nothing to go wrong). Great for commuting because work schmutter comes out wearable not crumpled rags and massive capacity when you need it.

No designer cred or hipster bollocks just an immensely practical utilitarian tool.

All memes to green...Fire up Critical Mass signal..."Go Go London Cyclists...ENGAGE!".

MP's all about the car for shopping. Would love a sea of bikes muck up her dastardly plans for automotive retail domination. Perhaps take a leaf out of the anonymous playbook and all wear a pair of Kinky Knickers on their heads.

Whoops sorry to motorist I woke up when lane splitting on approach to Fiveways junction this morning. Millimetres out on gap between wing mirrors so clonked his nearside one a bit. No wobbles and fair play he accepted apologetic gesture and mouthing of "sorry" without any unnecessary shit.

Then again he was in wrong lane and indicating to cross traffic and turn left so maybe he was edging in and stole my gap (yeah right Mr Infallible).

Nice bike. How does it handle with "square shouldered" front tyre?

I don't get on with City Slickers front & rear, felt all wrong somehow so always put a rounder profiled tyre up front.

Glad you got a positive and supportive response. In my experience most people you'll encounter in the workplace are sensible and surprisingly sympathetic under these sort of circumstances - but you don't necessarily discover this until you have to go somewhere uncomfortable in raising a genuine concern or grievance.

On info. available the client's behaviour was completely and utterly unacceptable. Sexual harassment, bullying & inappropriate and uninvited physical contact are a scourge in the workplace. Do not tolerate or suffer in silence.

I'm a ruffty bloke but have been on the receiving end a couple of times and it's not pleasant to have to deal with. I go to work to work, not have my arse touched when I'm sorting out a network printer.

Arsehole in a blue mercedes overtook me as I was approaching a parked car today. Oncoming traffic as well so he was basically funneling me into the back of the stationary vehicle. Made the gap (inches to spare) and called him a fucking cunt. He then pulled across in a blatant attempt to either force me into the kerb or rear-end him. Avoided that motorised assault but was so pissed off I loosed a turbo-torrent of verbal abuse. He shot off but got stuck in traffic at a roundabout about 100 yards ahead. Obviously caught up to give him an extended reprise of the earlier invective. I think he'd expected to be able to get away with this outrageous vehicular bullying scott-free but had him trapped and squirming like a treen in a disabled spaceship.

Some satisfaction had but jesus that was the shittiest piece of cuntery I've encountered on the road this year.

Fort Tilden. Portrait of satisfyingly annoying over-entitled faux artsy NY goils. Warning contains bikes, boobs and beaches. 7/10 would watch again.

Listen Up Philip. Portrait of satisfyingly annoying over-entitled literary academic. Warning contains bikes, books and bitches. 9/10 would watch again.

Dirty Weekend. Portrait of irritating, shallow, poorly realised business travellers stranded in ABQ. Warning contains bisexuals, bondage and bad acting. No bikes, just a micro scooter. 2/10 would not watch again.

Rule of threes. Three fried eggs on three pieces of toast rules.

Two not enough. Four and greedy guts will need a shit real soon.

Three is the magic number.

What my brother means is, it would be a shame if ah...
[throws tipper truck to the floor shattering it]

Lovely looking build, but I'm never not bothered about fact that as watercooling has gained in popularity, PSUs have migrated to bottom of the case. Leak...fzzzt....BANG!

There's a tattoo designed to identify baldy, shrivel-pricked Aussie wankstains at a glance.

Re. the sergeant's "flawed" evidence, as a reasonably law-abiding citizen it was a bit of a shock when I fell afoul of the Met's arcane evidentiary practices many years ago.

Turned up at station as requested for interview, sensibly kept schtum to have my day in court.

Amazingly between times my old school right to silence had been written up by the old bill as "Yes, it was me...I did it".

Luckily enough I had a rake of witnesses so rightfully copped an absolute discharge but it was a real eye-opener to hear 100% fabricated incriminating statements ascribed to me on oath in open court.

And that, best beloved, is how the filth earned their name.

Apart from Sky as "silent" sponsor Wiggo's lined up Whyte Bikes to supply frames and Brasso as lead sponsor.

Proposed name for new team is "Whyte-Brasso", so Wiggins' kit will be covered in this, especially the shorts.

Ant-Man? I was thinking of something more classical...perhaps along the lines of "FORMI-CUNT!!!"

Experienced Newton's third law of the cinematic universe this weekend - the one which means an awesome film will inevitably be followed by a shit piece of eyewatering shittiness.

The good: Mr Turner. 10/10 Brilliant.

The trite, tripebucket-worthy self indulgent, pretentious, boring waste of two hours: The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby Them. Unrelentingly Awful. I'd rather have just had a really long shit. Everyone involved should just #fuckrightoffnow

Top rat.

Sort of thing Mad Max would cart on the rack of his V8 Interceptor for guzoline runs.

Can be tough on the shoulder carting outsize loads (think sack of spuds or a fissionable quantity of plutonium and shielding) but humping less than 30lbs or so in my old sack just sits there nicely.

If you need a large capacity courier bag and not fussed about the pose factor then suggest you get hold of newspaper-type courier bag with shoulder strap.

Unbeatably versatile, damn near indestructible and cheap as buggery.

Tooling south on Park Lane using a nearly empty bus lane encountered a mixed pair on Boris bikes hugging wrong side of white line dicing with deadly traffic in the mad van & general anarchic mayhem lanes.

Suggested they might be safer in the bike nice fluffy lane and they cut over sharpish.

Didn't look back to see whether they successfully negotiated Hyde Park Corner.

For what it's worth I had similar problems finding wide fitting footie boots.

Answer was to avoid north european manufacturers and stick with Italians.

Apparently they've historically used shorter, wider lasts so on that basis Diadora & Lotto offerings might be worth looking at.

Congrats. to Hippy for his most awesome achievement.

Surprised those calves could be contained by mere popsocks.