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He was a meal ticket for Nike inc. Surely they'd be able to root out someone at the testing central who'd give up the drug test schedule for a bung? Jesus, the yank are experts at that kind of tomfoolery. They're the most paranoid nation on the planet, probably more so that North Korea, and the bloke in charge there is clearly as mad as a box of frogs. We think that the Expeses Row was a bad one? We don't know the half of it.
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Crimplene. Haven't heard that for ages.
It was invented near where I grew up; http://www.savecrimplevalley.co.uk/A truly fantastic invention - guaranteed to have you sweating like you've been masturbating for a month with only a slight increase in walking pace.
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Flanders, okily dokily!