How to solve the reluctant stag?

Just wondering if anyone had any thoughts or inspiring tales. There's a stag party on the horizon, and the stag, despite revelling in the ruination of us married before him, is notoriously backward in coming forward when it comes to his own humiliation.

Some fellow invitees are suggesting giving him options along the line of "force" or "choice" and I was hoping for ideas on how to avoid that sort of ugliness with some deft manoeuvres to get him into the spirit of things...

If I was getting married the last thing I'd want is a 'stag'. It's not that weird to want to opt out of this sort of guff. Leave him be.

Yup...

Yeah, that's what I'm hoping to avoid.

He's been fairly proactive in creating scene like that on previous outings for others so it seems a bit much to let him off solely because we're a bit older now, and stag parties aren't compatible with macbooks and espresso.

Do something the 'stag' wants to do. Embarrassing people by taping them naked to lamp posts went out with 7" singles.

Oi what you on about? Vinyl is so now. New Lad stag dos in the other hand ...

It might be my choice of friends but there was no question of ritual humiliation or ruination on any of our stags, can't think of anything worse to be honest.

Don't listen to these soft old farts, stags are ace and compulsory! Force the little shit.

That said if he was the protagonist on others he shouldn't be let off the hook!

I had written cassettes but saw you and TS were posting in here so changed it to rekkids :P

http://vimeo.com/59774043

So wait, you're saying he loves doing that whole stag debachery thing to other people, but can't take it himself?

I really don't understand this whole macho bromance stag rubbish. If you want to go out on the lash, I'd rather just go out with a few friends, regardless of their XX / XY status. Titty bars and prostitution? No ta! It all seems so juvenile, misogynistic and laden with repressed homoeroticism.

You say it like those are bad things?

Don't listen to these soft old farts, stags are ace and compulsory! Force the little shit.

Olly, you juvenile mysoginist closet case.

Compulsory my arse. If any friend of mine said that to me I'd disown them.

Thought you'd bite :-)
Anyway, I never said owt about titty bars. Mine was on the Isle of Arran, there's nae titty there. Plenty of bromance and lord of the flies type stuff though. Lol

Anyway, staaag do wahey!

you're saying he loves doing that whole stag debachery thing to other people, but can't take it himself?

Exactly. We like to have a laugh and get unfashionably drunk but we keep ourselves to ourselves. If it wasn't for the very real stitch-ups he has orchestrated, it'd most likely be a few beers, a kebab, and home.

I take it back... He deserves everything he gets...

Maybe the best thing you could do would be to arrange to meet him somewhere (like a bear pub), tell him to get five pints in at exactly 7:35pm, then not turn up.

And don't go to the wedding, those things are INSUFFERABLE!

Marriage is for retards...

Drug him and leave him naked in a field in Scotland.

Perhaps the stag doth protest too much. If you want to get your own back, a couple pints and heading home by ten would have him proper gutted I reckon.

Yeah, hence the "force or choice" sentiment that's going round. But that just won't work - he will just point-blank refuse, and there's the risk of it turning schoolboy in front of the workmates he's invited along.

I need to come up with some more classy manoeuvres, which is why I thought LFGSS might be a good place for ideas.

From your descriptions of your own behaviours, with friends like you...