Cycling with the kids

I hate it.

Went to pick my daughter up from school today on my bike. Went to the supermarket afterwards, no problems, then back to school to pick up my son (he finishes later).

I think 'hmm there's lots of bikes in school today'. Then I notice that they are my kids bikes.

Annoying, the wife must have brought them in.

So I get my daughter off the back of my bike and tell her to get on her bike. My son goes on his.

It takes us about five minutes to get out of the gate because the path is narrow and not suited to bikes and I have to shout at the kids 'don't go out the gate'.

We go onto the road and cycle along. My daughter is five and cycles very slowly, but we cycle along the road, blocking half of it (the other half blocked by parked cars). Cars wait patiently behind us.

Then my daughter falls of into a puddle. Wah. Take several minutes to persuade her to get back on otherwise we won't go home. Get to the end of the road, she wants to cycle down the pavement, so we cross the road together and cycle down the other side.

Pavement is rough, and has trees in it.

My daughter doesn't like going fast, so cycles down at 5mph with her brakes on. My son (10) is off, I'm staying with my daughter.

Get down the hill, my son is sitting with his head in hands, his bike in the road.

Oh shit.

Seems he's hit a car.

Woman emerging from driveway of nursery, he's gone into her.

Man there says he's come bowling down the hill and hit the car or tried to take evasive action.

Seems he's not really injured and neither is the bike, he has a bloody chin and that's about it, but passer-by man and female driver both concerned.

I'm a bit embarrassed, it seems like my son at fault, the woman is keen to exchange details with the male witness as I think she's worried if it's said otherwise.

Will probably get some annoying letter from the school about wearing a helmet or something (because they do a good job of protecting your chin don't they?). I have told my son that if he's going to cycle on the pavement he needs to go at walking pace.

I hate having to shepherd kids on bikes. No road sense, the pavements are dangerous for cycling, and I'd just prefer to take them home on my bike.

Grr.

Not trying to start an argument here, but maybe don't let your kids cycle a) on the pavement b) on their own and c) without helmets?

@ lawnet

some training organisations offer family lessons, to help all of you ride in a similar manner and to give parents some guidance on how to marshall kids together.

tactics like having the slowest at the front, agreeing on riding strategy, position etc

totally agree the helmet would not have protected the chin!

a ten year old child with good road sense and understanding should be fine to cycle on their own, but by that age should be riding on the road

Agree with James. Take the kids for a day out with a cycle trainer. That way when the schools send you a letter you can reply 'my kids have ceritications from a registered cycle training programme, I wish you offered this to the rest of your pupils'.

Bam!

Me and my little brother did a cycle training program thingy when I was 8 and he must have been about 6, it helped a lot with confidence for riding on the road and just general road awareness.

I also hate it. There's a little bit of an age gap between my little brother and I - well, fifteen years - and the dynamic is similar to you and your son; he just goes flying off (at a good 12-15mph) swapping between the road and the pavement completely arbitrarily and without shoulder-checking. He's slowly getting better but still picks up terrible habits from my parents (like cycling in the door zone).

The funny thing is that he's a complete wimp off-road. Walks over every dropoff and holds his brakes down any incline. Natural roadie, perhaps.

Every time I go and visit I try to tell my parents that they all need cycle training, but they're apathetic (about everything).

TBH I'd rather not cycle with them. They sit on my bike, we very happily cover 1000 miles or so per year that way.

I am opposed to cycle helmets, but it's a difficult position to hold because if you have any kind of minor accident they will ask 'why wasn't he wearing a helmet', no matter how irrelevant it might be to the cut knee. He's at a private prep school, so they are all goody-two-shoes ten-year olds, and quite a few say 'where's your helmet'.

My wife is a pavement cyclist. I don't like this. But realistically my daughter is going to cycle at 6mph max, and we can't go on any but the quietest of cul-de-sacs at that speed.

My son has Aspergers and not great at awareness and stuff like that. He has been told before not to go off in front, but obviously not really drilled in well enough. We had a good go at him and said that next time he might not be so lucky.

I just came back from parent's evening, and the woman who hit him was there.

I get the impression that she feels that she might bear some responsibility and seemed quite contrite. I spoke to my son earlier and it seems that he was hit from the side. She said something about coming out 'very slowly' and there being hedges blocking the view. The bike was in the road, so I am not sure what kind of evasive action was taken.

Ultimately it would be better to cycle in the road, and I'd be cycling close to the centre line and he to my left, and visibility would have been good, but I've not seen my five-year-olds on the road. The odd one or two on the pavement with Dad cycling in the gutter alongside sometimes.

I've cycled home with him on the road a few times, I try to drill it to him - we're turning right here, keep to the right of the lane, remember to change your gears down, but he doesn't have his own road sense to really think and respond to things like a car noise behind (shoulder check), or sometimes when I say 'move over' he can take it too literally and start cycling on the verge or something. Not fun for me, at all.

Sounds like part of problem was due to speed difference meaning you couldn't be in both places at once.

Maybe invest in a tag along for the 5yr old, you can then match speed of 10yr old.

P.s. Best to seek specialist advice re the Aspergers and following instructions whilst cycling, I think CTUK or similar will have instructors who work with SEN riders.

I have invested in a cargo bike for both of them, but it's set up for me so my wife takes them (rarely) on their own bikes.

Invest in another cargo bike specifically for your wife, selling both the kids bikes to fund it ;)

My wife and I don't see eye to eye on cycling matters unfortunately.

I'm still trying to persuade her she should cycle to work.

take the wheels off the car for some blag reason n hide her purse, jobs a good un shell have to cycle

Well I already told her she has to pay the petrol bill. That hasn't stopped her.

Next thing is the car insurance coming next month. That's going onto her name.

Service due in January, that was £1k last time, not sure what she'll think of that...

wtf you driving ??? 1k service, must be a lamborarri, only 99 quid round here for us normal people ;)

im toying with a seat on my bike for the little one, hes not even 2 yet tho and the ex hates the idea, mainly cos shes a bit retarded and cant pedal, drive, occasionally even walking beats her tbh

how old where yours when you got them on 2 wheels ??

My daughter and I frequently cycle to and from school, and have done since she was 4. From the age of 5 she has always cycled on the road. We also cycle at weekends.
We started by me telling her when it was safe to go at junctions and pointing out road obstacles and potential hazards, road positioning etc. I now leave the decission making to her (she's 8). in the last year I've had to drag her back once. It was the cars fault not hers.

There was no training available and there is now only limited facilities. She's done 1 course and they had undone alot of good work and shook her confidence. She won't be going back until they change their views on a lot of things.

I don't live in London, just a tiny little town bu the sea.

£1k was including 4 tyres at £170ish each.

Here's the road:

https://maps.google.co.uk/maps?q=Horsell+Rise,+Woking&hl=en&ll=51.328071,-0.565356&spn=0.006409,0.013078&sll=52.8382,-2.327815&sspn=12.706523,26.784668&oq=horsell+rise&hnear=Horsell+Rise,+Woking,+Surrey+GU21,+United+Kingdom&t=m&z=17&layer=c&cbll=51.327989,-0.565227&panoid=bZWRoWE-IjpKZAr6WkazKw&cbp=12,132.45,,0,8.86

We were cycling on the left pavement. It's a residential road but a through road. If you follow it down the hill the pavement is really quite shit for cycling on

Collision occurred at the first driveway on the left here:

https://maps.google.co.uk/maps?q=Horsell+Rise,+Woking&hl=en&ll=51.326469,-0.56321&spn=0.006409,0.013078&sll=52.8382,-2.327815&sspn=12.706523,26.784668&oq=horsell+rise&hnear=Horsell+Rise,+Woking,+Surrey+GU21,+United+Kingdom&t=m&z=17&layer=c&cbll=51.326531,-0.563317&panoid=agETaiax_gHZsoB8FTbwzw&cbp=12,128.53,,0,6.79

My daughter is not very confident generally and doesn't like to put much effort in. I asked her before we came down the hill and she said she wanted to cycle on the pavement.

We could cycle on the road I guess, there's more traffic than that Streetview applies due to two schools in the vicinity and quite a bit of housing, and cars parked on the nearside also, but it's not so busy that they couldn't pass us travelling down there at about 5-6mph without difficulty.

Trouble is my wife doesn't think children should be on the road at all. In fact she doesn't think SHE should be there. Last year my wife was cycling on the pavement in the ice/snow and got a nasty gash on her knee. I pointed out that it wouldn't have happened on the road but she doesn't listen.

im toying with a seat on my bike for the little one...

The only time I've broken a limb cycling was through one of those top tube seats. My son decided to dangle his legs in front of the front wheel because it "looked like a fan". He then managed to get his foot jammed in the wheel which locked against the fork and stopped the bike dead, flipping us both over the handle bars. I grabbed him and put out an arm out to break the fall - bust my elbow. Luckily he was wearing a helmet otherwise he would have face-planted the road - he got away with a scuffed nose - the only bit of his face protruding beyond the lip of the lid.

Bless 'em...

i think rhb has it covered here...

I wish there was more scope for my son riding on the road around where I live, but all he's done (at age 5) is a few laps of Finsbury Circus on a quiet Sunday afternoon, and the odd little bit where we've crossed a road so that he can keep going on the pavement with me in the road next to him. The back roads are still used as rat-runs during very off-peak hours. But that's life in EC1. Not very easy to travel by public transport (to get to quieter places) with bikes in tow either. Sort of limited to me carrying his bike and my Brompton on a bus, and then onwards via a train station.

Next summer I'm intending to organise a day out where we ride to Liverpool St (him on the pavement again, probably), and then get a train out to one of the traffic-free routes in the countryside i.e. disused railway line.

Anyway, I sympathise with the OP.

I don't like cycling with my son because when he drops me I'm an old fart and when I drop him I'm a vindictive old fart. The former is happening a lot more often than the latter..............

In truth cycling with a loved one or handing a loved one a bike brings into focus the dangers we don't think about much. My heart fell when my son got into road rather than mtb.

Lawnet - good for you, taking it all so calmly. I'd probably not be so calm. I live in the same part of London as Bringmemyfix and I probably over estimate the risks to my kids here and do the same type of shouting, and un-cool-ness generally when cycling with them (err, or maybe not, given MY joyful ride to work this morning :-) . Looking at the streetview you posted that's exactly the sort of road I'd encourage my kids to cycle on....and then be scared about what might happen. For me its the hard choice of giving them room to grow, even if it feels scary to you...

Picked my son up from school today. He got looked up and down by a father who takes his son home in a Mercedes ML, a sort of 'you neglectful bastard, how dare you take your children home by bike' look.

I asked him if he had been quizzed about it. 'The school secretary asked me what happened, I said I fell off my bike, and she asked me why, so I said I got hit by a car' 'She said I should wear a helmet'. I said to him 'that won't do much to protect your chin will it'.

He then asked me 'how do bike helmets work'. I said 'do you see that car? What will happen if it hits another car?' 'It will crush', he said, 'so bike helmets work the same way'. 'Yes I said, but do you know how much a car weighs?' 'Two or three tonnes' 'And how much does a bike helmet weigh?' 'About 300 grams'. 'And do you know what the formula for force is?' 'No' 'It's force = mass * acceleration. What do you think the acceleration would be if a car hits a wall at 60mph?' 'About 5mph per second?' 'No, it wouldn't take 12 seconds to stop would it, it would be much quicker than that.'

Anyway he had to go to his climbing lesson at this point, so I didn't have time to explain the rest of the relative physics of deceleration between a car bonnet and airbags and a polystyrene helmet.