Golf

What a bunch of steaming old cack. I can't even pretend to like it ironically. The cnuts in my office are LISTENING TO IT ON THE FUCKING RADIO

repped.
Golf is the bane of my fucking working life.
I pretty much have to write off june and july because of the Open Championship (though on the plus side it's the only time I get paid overtime and it was a fuck of a lot this year). Right now I'm sitting watching a scorecard update to see if there are any bugs in the AJAX leaderboard/scorecard system I have written. dull

^ Quality summarising.

they wont be listening to it for much longer. its fucking pissing it down over this side of the world, it was the only thing that kept me going in the rain this morning knowing that a load of people had paid a shit load of money to go stand in it and watch the golf.
If it hasn been called off yet its bound to be soon as the rain hasn't stopped here yet

There are bugs. piss. fucking cutlines. Who really gives a fuck about cutlines?
And why doesn't XSLT recognise that +5 is a fucking number?

shit to watch, fun to play.. as long as you're not being too serious and take a hip flask of something with you

I quite like it. I enjoy long drawn out sports/tournaments, just like cricket. I revert to childhood when I watch golf, gurgling and dribbling in catatonic suspended-animation at the total non-event of it all. I quite like that feeling too.

What a bunch of steaming old cack. I can't even pretend to like it ironically. The cnuts in my office are LISTENING TO IT ON THE FUCKING RADIO

That wouldn't happen here.. headphones if you want to listen to that shit or death by sharpened pencil stabbing.

shit to watch, fun to play.. as long as you're not being too serious and take a hip flask of something with you

Isn't that the rule with all sports?

And fishing?

And the laundrette?

golf is a game for anal bedwetters and pillow biters.

Ooh anal bedwetting. Nasty.
True.

Isn't that the rule with all sports?

And fishing?

And the laundrette?

Nope, I enjoy watching football and playing it - same with cycling/skiing/cricket etc etc

Why aren't they playing in the rain? They have someone to hold their brolly FFS.

Golf is ace,
its like a zen game, getting relaxed enough to just swing the club
bit like fixie riding really

but it is mainly played by business orientated dickweasels

ian woosnam

there, i said it..

*relaxes

*scrubs sheets

i love golf.

Jezuz christ nothing bores like a golf and golfers. And WFT is that clothing all about? And someone on the wireless referred to them as "athletes" yesterday. FFS. Them and darts players presumably.

Golf. Ram it up yer anus with the media experts and management consultants.

Ian Poulter is a twat

An American I know, when asked if he enjoyed golf responded:

I don't golf and i believe that those who do should not be allowed to vote or reproduce

It's weird is golf - I now a couple of people who are in most other respects normal and well adjusted people and not crypto-twats at all so as you'd notice, who glaze over and turn all mega-twatty as soon as golf is mentioned.

Host a major multi-million dollar weather-dependent outdoor sporting event in Wales. In October. Genius. That's golf for you. Had the whole of the USA and Europe to choose from; possibly the entire globe. No: Wales.

the laundrette?

You've dropped an 'e'...

naughty naughty
YouTube - The Shamen - Ebeneezer Goode - Lyrics included

WOODS HAS SEX WITH DIRTY MERMAIDS

GOLFING intercourse monster Tiger Woods has taken advantage of the wet weather in Wales by sleeping with a string of underwater prostitutes.

** **
It was either one of these or a fish

The rain has been so heavy in Newport over the last few days that the Ryder Cup has had to be moved steadily further inland, with the final day's play taking place at Brandon Wood Muncipal Golf Course in Coventry.

Tournament organisers were alerted to the scandal after a 250-pound turbot pimp marched into their headquarters demanding payment.

The aquatic flesh procurer claimed Woods had ordered the 'Ariel Special' - which includes 300 jars of crab paste and full scuba equipment - but had then refused to pay the marine tarts after they forgot the words to Under the Sea.

Golfologist Bill McKay said: "Tiger has 'Ocean Fever' and loves romping with women that can hold their breath for hours at a time.

"He's been like this since he was a 14 and was thrown out of Orlando Sea World for touching himself in front of Shamu."

Meanhwhile 2009 Open champion Stewart Cink has refused to practise with Woods, claiming the world number one 'smells like a walrus fandango'.

And US captain Corey Pavin has been forced to ask the player to confine himself to the hotel breakfast kippers whenever he has to get his cryptozoological freak on.

Nikki Hollis, a 23-year-old mermaid dollymop from the Denmark Straits, said: "On Friday night he called me up and asked if it was possible to do a reverse Dutch steamboat in eight feet of muddy water.

"I didn't know you could do it any other way."

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUz3fLncTTs"]YouTube
- Smoke City - Underwater Love[/ame]