Whiny BMW dobber dobs me to cops

Coming down Queen Street on my usual commute through Festival madness, I'm riding on the outside of cars in the right hand lane as I am wont to do, whistling a fine tune. Pinch point at the lights on Broughton St so I pull over past a BMW waiting at the lights. Bomb it down Leith Walk then hit the usual red at McDonald Rd, so I do my usual onto the pavement (nae peds) then back into traffic a wee bit down the road. I see a rozzer tootling along behind me, then he pulls alongside as I am spinning down Broughton Rd, two mins from home and some fine tea. "Pull over at the bus-stop pal" says PC Ginger Nut so I do. He gives me the usual, "So why d'you think I stopped you?" chat. I'm trying hard not to say any of the myriad responses fizzing around my brain (suggestions welcome), so he says, "A guy behind you said you ran the red light back there. Why would I go half a mile out of my way to stop you just for a chat?" I consider giving him the "Oh no occifer, I never RLJ, no, not me" but am just honest with him and told him he was wrong. Ah. "Your word against mine, isn't it pal? Now, you look like a competent cyclist, and I'm just letting you know it's a slap on the wrist next time, eh?' I say, "Where are you when I'm two inches from death at least three times a day?" All ends amicably but then I see the Beamer dude drive past, smiling. Cop is still keeping his eye on me as I ride off, so I can't ride up to BMWank and knock his
mirror off.

FFS. I'm pretty sure the Beamer guy wasn't 8, nor did I hear him going "Ner ner ner ner ner" but I've never been stopped by the rozzers due to information given by a car driver. Wank.

and wipe the keyboard.

I blame the parents.

try riding on the road, lawfully and see if the BMW driver is still smiling.

some people must really love their desk jobs, so keen to avoid stopping at any cost

When can we live in a world where we can illegally jump a red light, without BMW drivers telling the police about it? it's a nanny state I tell you!

Should have made yourself invisible.
Works every time.

ok its the bike beat the Beamer down the road, and there's the rub, this beamer driver is just a TOSSER (and you avoided the hold-up in thetraffic by going onthe outside too, double bummer for him).

As John Major said- don't let the bastards get you down, and do remember when he said that he was merrily shagging Edwina Curry (hot stuff?).

At least he paid the road tax! :-0

OK, you've been naughty and jump the red, but the guy is a tosspot for grassing you up only to be spiteful. I'm not going to very popular here (well, I'm not anyway already), but I also drive a car with my baby on the back. I really wouldn't like to hit a cyclist who decided to jump the red light. I'd feel awful, because a) I'd endanger my daugther's life, b) I'd be shattered if I injured/killed a fellow cyclist

At least he paid the road tax! :-0

OK, you've been naughty and jump the red, but the guy is a tosspot for grassing you up only to be spiteful. I'm not going to very popular here (well, I'm not anyway already), but I also drive a car with my baby on the back. I really wouldn't like to hit a cyclist who decided to jump the red light. I'd feel awful, because a) I'd endanger my daugther's life, b) I'd be shattered if I injured/killed a fellow cyclist

Simple solution, stop strapping your baby to the back of the car and you will feel much more at ease?

i don't think he did rlj, he rode on the pavement.

Simple solution, stop strapping your baby to the back of the car and you will feel much more at ease?

I'll let her drive next time

are you Sottish? For some reason, whilst reading that I was reading it in a Scots accent!

Who? Me or the author of the original post? I know I pronounce my "Rs" to hard, but I wear underwear under my kilt:-)

The OP!

...Queen Street...Festival madness...(nae peds)...

You live in Edinburgh and I claim my 5 pounds.

oh yeah :-)

Sorry, this is LONDONfgss . . . there must be a 'Queen St' in London somewhere!

goes to check Google maps

No festival happening right now tho ;)

every day is somebody's birthday.....

Got one! Queen Street, London.

Got one! Queen Street, London.

Avoid that one. It's full of RLJing sweaties.

Try not to walk the pavement there, you might get hit!

i'm amazed i've not been done by the police recently - i've been riding around edinburgh like a total cunt, i think brakeless has made me a naughty boy and i love skidding too much.

Next time, op, dismount your bike at the traffic lights, and walk it past the junction. Hop back on after it, swear wildly at the cars, and ride off.

I once stopped at the open window of a police car stopped at old street roundabout and said, "see that guy on the moped there? He just jumped 2 red lights and did an illegal u turn, whilst putting all of us cyclists who had stopped at these lights in danger."

The cop said "If I didn't see it I can't do anything."

Either my cop or your cop was lying.