"Shame you're not dead!"

Hi all!

So I'm a bit sick these days, got a cold... Yesterday I did not have the courage / strength to cycle and took my motorbike...

Today I felt a bit better, so I decided to cycle. I though, OK, I will be very slow so I might as well take my touring bike, it may be more consistant, whatever... So here I am on my Mercian, riding to work.

Between New Cross and Peckham I see coming on the opposite direction a guy on a bike that looked a lot like CoppiThat one... I though shit! he got his bike stollen, but when looking better, not the same very remarkable handle bars so it was another bike really... Funny because the geometry, the colour, the overall style was quite similar...

So due to that, I am distracted and I don't see the mini cab doing a left turn just in front of me and cut my way, otherwise I think I would have been able to slow down in time... BANG, he hits me, I fell of my bike, I am lying on the floor in the middle of the junction.
A cyclist I see often there in the morning (matt black Giant track frame, red tyres, low airwing handle bars) comes to give me assistance, collect my hat and my watch that I'd lost during the crash. Thank you very much man, I will see you soon on the same spot probably!

First of all, I was all fine, no pain at all, no damage on my clothes, the shock was not very violent actually. I know I should have gone to the hospital in theory, like said on the "what to do in case of an accident", but I really did not feel the need for that, I am now writing 2.5hours after it happened, the adrenaline is probably gone and still no pain, no headhache, I really feel OK.
So I look at the bike, no dent, no scratch, both wheels are true, just a bit of my bar tape is cut, but I bought some new at the HH jumble the other day as I don't like the colour at the moment... really nothing wrong so far... Even my watch is fine, no scratch either, and still running perfect...

In the mean time the guy in the mini cab had stopped, and immediately came to me to ask if I was fine and to apologize. I believe the guy was sincere, and I hope he learned something about left turns...
While I talk to him, a guy in a BMW X5 comes to us and start saying to the minicab driver that it was not his fault, that I was cycling mad anyway and that he almost hitted me couple of hundreds meters before. He finally wants to give his buisness card to him... WTF?? the cab guy don't take the card and tells him that I am cool about what happened. He leaves... So I go the man in the X5 and tells him I am not complaining or anything like this and that he should shut it when he has no clue what he is talking about. The he start making a speach about how I was cycling (I know when I am doing things wrong when I do, and I was definitely not being unsafe this morning...). The guy is unstoppable and becomes all crazy just by himself, fighting against who knows what, I can't even say a word, the fact english is not my first language does not help me in thoses situations... But I was very calm and did not really give a shit anyway, but the mad man keeps shouting... He's a bit like Mark in Peep Show, same kind of caracter, with a much bigger dark side obviously!
So I am not listenning anymore to his bullshit, but before he escapes, he says to me "I'm glad he hit you!!! Shame you're not dead". He presses like mad the accelerator of the BMer and in a smooth and low and arrogant engine noise, the car disappears, I did not take the plate number, I always forget to do so...

I can't believe that, amazing the degree of badness in that guy!!!

Anyway, I am still very cool, I put my watch, my hat on, and I'm gone to work for good now... Later in Brixton, I start from a red light, and CRACK! I can't go further, the backwheel is blocked, the back axle is broken... It was bent already, since I got the bike, and probably the shock of the accident weakened it even more...

Here comes the other interesting part of my story... I still need to go to work, no chance I would lock my bike anywhere, and I don't have a lock anyway. I need to take the bus with my bike, I know they will say no... So I take both wheels off, attach them along the frame with my scarf, and hope this "shitty flatpacking" will do.

The bus 37 comes, the guy says no, and I say all my story, bla bla, I beg him, he says "there is nothing to do with me", I answer "I know, nothing to do with you, but YOU CAN help!!" Touche! He lets me come in! Thanks president Obama for the YES WE CAN rhetoric, it works! I step into the bus, put my Oyster card on the machine, and O ultimate shame, no money on it!!! I use TFL so few that I never know what's on it... The driver rolls his eyes to the sky, but let me in anyway... That guy was gold I sewar!! I'm often pissed off with buses, but he was quality... He looked a bit like the old Marlon Brando...

Ok, I'd better do some work now!!

Szia

Loic

Loic,

sorry to hear about the accident, though eloquently written.
Don't worry about the idiot in the Beemer, he's a cnut, and best to just let it go. Don't get into a heated debate and let him take his hate somewhere else.
Glad to hear your okay, though the bikes a bit the worse for wear.

be well.

there's a beer waiting for you at souths' when your next down..

The rule: you win some, you lose some.

Beware the BMW drivers of this world. You should have just ignored him, perhaps.

Edit: I blame coppiThat, for not being the guy that wasn't him, then none of this would have happened. Apologies if I am missing something.

Hope you sort the wheel out without too much trouble.

Glad you're okay Loic. That could've been nasty.

The BMW driver is clearly a weapons grade knob end and not worth the bubbles from my spit. Forget him.

Nicely written, you and Herr Schick put us native English speakers to shame.

Sorry to hear about that Loic, I'm glad you're okay and that the worst that happened to the bike was a slightly more broken axle and some scuffed bar-tape that you were going to change anyway.

Also, it was nice to see you yesterday while you were out on the motorbike.. A motorised spotted

Well I could not really ignore the guy on the Beemer, he was there with us, he invited himself in the debate... but no worries, I feel no hate and am still pretty cool about the whole thing...

In fine, within all that mess, I came across 2 decent guys (the minicab driver, he did not try to escape, he could have, and the bus driver)

I need now to go to the bike shop at lunch time, get a new axle, and fit it so I can cycle back home tonight! That's another good side of the story I forgot to tell, I did not loose any of the balls of the bearing, even if I was struggling in the bus with my wheels all over the place!!

Thanks for you messages guys!

Szia

Loic

Glad you are alright, shame about the axle.

Beware the BMW drivers of this world.

Generally they are total cnuts.

I bet he only uses that uneconomical tank to take his overweight child to school in.

sounds like he touches children.
and i don't mean like ET, either.

I can really picture the scene, Loic being his "nonchalant" self and the BMW driver going ape!
There is so much stress in this city...

He's a bit like Mark in Peep Show, same kind of caracter, with a much bigger dark side obviously!

lol - maybe he was driving Johnson's BMW :D

glad you're ok, loic. Let's hope that the bmw drivers are the minority on the road. I was once taken out by a car just because I was in front of him on a narrow road. It's good to hear that the bus was compassionate enough to see you needed some help.

Hope to see you on the road soon.

lol - maybe he was driving Johnson's BMW :D

Yes, it was a black Beemer actually, like in the show!!

L

hope you get it all fixed up soon. Liked reading the account - and mind tricks on the bus driver. Good work!

sorry brother :-) i wasn't even riding that bicycle today.

i am so glad that you are okay, you must start wearing a helmet. i'll get you one.

i would say ride safely but its carry it home safely i guess. speak to you in the morning.

Edit: I blame coppiThat, for not being the guy that wasn't him, then none of this would have happened. Apologies if I am missing something.

You raise a valid point there Skully. I think Gerald has some explaining to do.

Good story Loic. I'm glad you're OK and the bus driver helped you out. Chapeau to him.
The BMW driver is living up to the stereotype in every way. wanker.

sorry brother :-) i wasn't even riding that bicycle today.
i am so glad that you are okay, you must start wearing a helmet. i'll get you one.
i would say ride safely but its carry it home safely i guess. speak to you in the morning.

Well I hope the guys at Putney Cycle will be as good as usual, and I should be able to ride the bike back tonight...

Szia

L

Small angry guy+big expensive car= small cock*

*There are some exceptions.

I have a few spare rear wheels if you need to borrow one.

Glad you're ok Loic, sounds like another penis extension BMW driver to me.
Enjoyed reading the story - you have a lovely way with words my friend.
See you on the road!

+1 to all the nicely told comments. You should write a thing for the LFGSS book. Glad you're OK.

I have a few spare rear wheels if you need to borrow one.

Glad to see you back here Paul!
And thanks for the offer, if I can't fix the wheel at lunch time, that could help me cycling back home tonight, I let you know! Thanks!

Loic

Loic, where are you working? I live in putney and am mates with the manager at Putney cycles. Not working today so if it makes life a bit easier for you I can pick up the wheel and take it to PC for ya

Glad you are ok. Horrid story with a good ending. Nicely narrated.

Bloody
Misanthropic
Wanker

But let's not generalise. It is possible that some BMW drivers are kind to animals and love their mothers.

Not surprise about the BMW driver. They always seem to conform to stereotype.

nope, they don't conform to stereotype, we made it into a stereotype simply because they have a BMW.

it doesn't mean BMW drivers are likely to be offender, just for some odd and bizarre reason we seemed to notice it being a BMW more than the other type of manufacturer.

Same goes for Mercedes drivers.

Even worse if you get the Merc/minicab driver combo.

Stereotyping piffle.