A touching and slightly macabre tale

Just received the following from a list I'm on and thought it might make interesting reading for some of you, considering how passionate people are here about their bikes:

Stan Haley was a bike mechanic. He wrenched for nearly all the local
Lansing shops, even though he had a couple of Graduate Degrees. He just
loved bicycles. He spent the last 16 years of his mechanic's career working
for my buddy Bill at Holt Pro Cyclery. Then Stan decided to retire. He had
some good years. He got a job as a rural newspaper delivery person to
supplement his income or as something to do, I really don't know which.
Stan was out working on that weekend before last when he was struck by a car
and killed. Besides his family, Stan left behind vintage bicycles, a huge
collection of vintage jerseys, bike tees (some of which may come to Cirque
with me) and bike tools. And one last and very unusual request.

His beloved regular ride was a custom built 'bent. Off topic to us here,
but very much on topic for Stan. True to Stan's wish, the thing was taken
to my buddy's shop last Friday and Bill worked far into the night getting
Stan's ashes into its' frame. His wish was to have his ashes installed in
it and to have it hang over his favorite bar, where he had spent many a
happy hour. I think they hung it yesterday.

So Stranger, if your travels should take you to Beggar's Banquet, a very
venerable and well known Bar in East Lansing, Michigan and you should cast
your eyes up above the bar and see a rather exotic recumbent bike in a
place of honor, think of old Stan, who is hanging out there, still.

That's weird.

Nice one. I'm going to be shot into the sun. Not when I pass, I mean just generally.

I am going to be eaten by Christians.

alive.

alive.

"Let he without sin take the first bite"

They can have my shoes for pudding.

"Let he without sin take the first bite"

Wigan it is then...

I want to be made into a selection of fine cheese triangles..

now that tale is slightly macabre but this one... is fucking great!

He worked far into the night getting the ashes into the frame?

I would have just taken the seatpost/forks/whatever's on a recumbant out and tipped him in... Mechanic fail.

At least they cremated the body first, before attempting to stuff him into a bike frame.

That's brilliant, almost makes me want to go to Michigan.

Almost.

At least they cremated the body first, before attempting to stuff him into a bike frame.

Taxidermy him and just pop him on the bike! You could stick him on a big slot car track and stick a mini motor on him.

I want to be made into a selection of fine cheese triangles..

now that tale is slightly macabre but this one... is fucking great!

My fucking god. Saved his life by chewing through his large intestine. That is some fucked up shit.

Calling a recumbent bike a " 'bent" is a very worrying thing. Allowing a former customer to park his 'bent in your bar until Judgement Day is plain weird.

I can see no attractions in the things at all, aesthetic, spiritual or social.

I can see no attractions in the things at all, aesthetic, spiritual or social.

You just haven't ridden one, Clive. Go to Bikefix sometime and ask to try one out.

Men and their machines!

What would the female equivalent be? Ashes stuffed into their Jimmy Choo's heels and have them put on top of their favourite Champagne bar?
;)

good god... jimmy who?

now that tale is slightly macabre but this one... is fucking great!

The dead guy in the recumbent is very sweet and a really beautiful story...

This one is fucking horrific!! Stupid horny little bollox!!

Men and their machines!

What would the female equivalent be? Ashes stuffed into their Jimmy Choo's heels and have them put on top of their favourite Champagne bar?
;)

Or added to a nice broth or something. Birds love cooking.

Bloody motorists

The dead guy in the recumbent is very sweet and a really beautiful story...

This one is fucking horrific!! Stupid horny little bollox!!

fantastically well written though. but there is nothing sweet about it. it's one that scars you for life!

Or added to a nice broth or something. Birds love cooking.

pop it in the water for the steam iron

Scatter on the carpet and vacuum clean with the beautifully engineered Dyson that her husband bought her for her birthday.

pop it in the water for the steam iron

It'd stain our clothes pal, when the next girlfriend gets round to using it.

It'd stain our clothes pal, when the next girlfriend gets round to using it.

Monica Lewinsky had the same idea.