WTF ya doing ya tit

Were the words uttered by a ped as I nerly ran him over.
he saw me ran across then stopped and cowered uttered what the fuck you doing you tit, What a tit
any tit /ped related neer misses,
sos if there's a thead on this but I need a laugh

Too many to mention! The intentional briefcase in the front wheel was my most recent altercation.

In the five years I've been riding in London, I've really never had many problems with pedestrians. Sure, they like to wonder into the road with ear-phones on without looking, but they're soft and squidgey and they don't break my bike. Mini-bus vans like the one this morning however...they're not so soft and squidgey.

A few months back though I did hit a drunk guy who was pushed in front of me by his friends. Boy oh boy, that must have really, really hurt him. He was floored, but I managed to make myself look mildly graceful, all things considered. I didn't hang about for fisticuffs. they were all quite pissed and scary.

I've only ever hit one ped, I was on my way to school on my bmx, he was on his way to school running between two buses, when he emerged I hit him. He absorbed all of my kinetic energy and I just stopped and sat there on my bike while he tumbled off down the road. Then he hoped up muttering "I'm sorry, I'm sorry", I asked if he was okay and he said yeah, I looked at him to calm him a bit and said "are you sure your okay?" and he was and ran off.

Other than that, in London I have so many near misses. The trick is look like a prick and to use a bell.

Peace

my knuckles are still a bit sore from yesterday morning when I was forced to hammer them hard on the driver's side window of a blinker wearing "destroyer of worlds" merc who'd just nearly killed me by edging me all the way into the kerb on an otherwise empty reget street. nearly went over his boot lid trying to brake and swerve from out of his way. gave him a good "OOOOIIIII!WHATHEFUCKAREYOUDOING!? (bang bang bang on window) CNUT!" before riding off with the middle finger rampant for his benefit. poor bastard nearly jumped out of skin when i hammered on the window and sort of did a momentary leap to get out/give chase/call the police before (hopefully) realising what he'd done and sitting back down.

The amount of half witted fuckers I have to deal with in one specific road is unbelievable.
The road where the Dragon Bar used to be in Shoreditch, its one way but there is a cycle lane. People literally leap out in front of you.

My policy is to cycle very fast down that road and if anyone steps out I make sure I miss them by less than an inch at full pelt. I almost made some cock drop his mobile phone the other day. I get all sorts of abuse, but I love it..

Personally Mike...I think you should be more aware of the traffic....we quite literally screamed at you outside Highgate tube this morning....you were totally oblivious!

we were in rollavan heading north.

As I mentioned on another thread, a dude attempted to block my path on purpose, holding his arms out in a christ pose as I went by I managed to snatch the phone form his hand. My friend uses the phone to this day. haha.

Peace

I ride that road mikec. Its difficult for peds as the work always going on there make some parts of the very narrow paths impassable. But still they oughta look. I have been doing a bit of that shit recently. Its naughty.

I screeched to a halt, side ways and hit the side of a private ambulance who wasn't looking were he was going at a mini roundabout, dumb ass pulled right out in front of me, still there are worse vehicles to be hit by than an ambulance.

My policy is to cycle very fast down that road and if anyone steps out I make sure I miss them by less than an inch at full pelt. I almost made some cock drop his mobile phone the other day. I get all sorts of abuse, but I love it..

someone did that and managed to kill a girl thought.

On my commute the school kids jaywalk between light changes at a set of lights and some get cocky about it dancing in front of the cars to block the traffic.

One morning this kid wearing a rucksack drinking a can of coke was mincing back and forth in front of a car, as my lights went green I could see there was room for me on the left and between him and the car so I sprinted off and swung around as he showed off to his mates and clipped the back of his bag with my elbow, he spun round like a top spraying coke all over his mates :D

Got a thumbs up from the driver as he came past later.

hahahahaha

I can only note that my voice screaming "WAKE THE FUCK UP!!!!" into someone's ear.. is actually louder than the bullshit tunes they're pumping from their ipoo.

someone did that and managed to kill a girl

Good point Ed. It's just too risky. How can you 'make sure' you miss someone by less than an inch, especially if you're going 'very fast' ?

was riding down the road once, parked cars to my left, stationary traffic to my right. some guy steps out into the road without looking. it happened so quick i just had to plough straight into him, i didnt fall off but sent him flying.

he did not apologise

jus gotta relax..

so what, you arrive a few seconds later at work/the pub/court. it doesn't matter.

even if you deliver "parcels" , I know most clients would rather have the parcel, intact, than not at all/damaged because you hit a ped/car/ambulance

I had a controller, many many years ago, and if you had an accident the first question he would ask you was 'Is the package ok?'.

He was referring to your genitals..

Most of the time peds are ok. Dodging them can be part of the fun. I must admit I don't mind screaming at the ones gliding across the road without thinking.

I've now done two sets of forks, a wheel and a headset on peds running across without looking. The worse part is that somehow I always get worse injuries than they do...

But... I'm embarrassed by the number of times I see riders shoot straight through pedestrians when the rider has a red light and the peds a 'green man'. It just gets us lot a bad name and the rider at the destination 5 seconds quicker.

i had a bunch of tourist/zombie wankers out side of Leicester Square today, i had greens, as did the buss and car stopped at the light while they just kept walking. I ran right into the middle of the pack, did a skid around two of them, then took off again yelling "Oi not stopping for you!!" the whole time. i find "Oi cunt i'm not stopping" (or any combination of those words) works well.

i had a bunch of tourist/zombie wankers out side of Leicester Square today, i had greens, as did the buss and car stopped at the light while they just kept walking. I ran right into the middle of the pack, did a skid around two of them, then took off again yelling "Oi not stopping for you!!" the whole time. i find "Oi cunt i'm not stopping" (or any combination of those words) works well.

Chris, "I'm not stopping" are the exact words used by the guy who hit a girl who died of the head injury she sustained when she hit the ground.

I had a controller, many many years ago, and if you had an accident the first question he would ask you was 'Is the package ok?'.

1.is the package ok?

1. are you ok to carry on working?
   
2. if "no" to 2 can you bring the radio back?
   

He was referring to your genitals..

I'd rep you if the system would let me.

I'd rep you if the system would let me.

It's okay, I understand..

VB FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT!!!! NOW NOW NOW!!!!
jumps up and down stomps feet throws tantrum
NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!!!!