I hate to start anew - but this is funny

I was just checking some early submissions on the fixed gear gallery and found this amusing description of his bike someone had sent in...(http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/quixote.htm)

Dennis,
Wuzzup homie, I dig tha FG site, tight as all-git-out!
Figgurz I need to representz for the I-O-W-A! FG-Man from tha Heartland yo! Born in tha corn ya'll! Now check my 2 rigs flava! One iz to CO-mmute back HOME, and tha utha to PO-llute the DROME!
Tha CO-mmuta is a Hell-If-I-Know frame witz partz from tha used-n-abused box at the loco-local shop while the PO'lutta is a top-notch pimpcycle wit DA cranks and hubs, fly PD fork, CK headset, Thompson represntz in tha stem, and 3T bars (oooh that s### is fine!). All dat on a RRB frame yizz-O!
Oh poota, I'm out! Donny Quixote

I don't speak much Japanese.. translation?

must be a honky , his chains are too tight..

It clearly was quite mistaken of us to curtail our insistance that these colonial types speak the good queen's english. Where will it all end?

sup g

i remember that one from back when. my favourite more recent one is here

well worth checking. a little flavour of - " and strapped-on a pair of Grand Prix 4000 Continentals, in matching brown/black motif. With these GP's incredible 4000 strands straining under 120-PSI this bike is like a steel crowbar prying through the roadie crowds on the PCH. "

yeah muthafucka yeah

The dude's gotta stop confusing trouser-clipped commuters with roadies..

Wuzzup homie, I dig tha FG site, tight as all-git-out!
Figgurz I need to representz for the I-O-W-A! FG-Man from tha Heartland yo! Born in tha corn ya'll! Now check my 2 rigs flava! One iz to CO-mmute back HOME, and tha utha to PO-llute the DROME!
Tha CO-mmuta is a Hell-If-I-Know frame witz partz from tha used-n-abused box at the loco-local shop while the PO'lutta is a top-notch pimpcycle wit DA cranks and hubs, fly PD fork, CK headset, Thompson represntz in tha stem, and 3T bars (oooh that s### is fine!). All dat on a RRB frame yizz-O!
Oh poota, I'm out! Donny Quixote

CHUG_IT's first incarnation.
Alas, things improved very little...:-((

he's really got that wordin shit locked down.

"Thompson represntz in tha stem"

fucking funny

platini- reported for dredging.

Dredging (up): recalling or bringing up something best left forgotten.
Jeez, you've got me bang to rights guv'nor, and no mistake...

you are a repeat offender, I believe?

this OP, though, was funny

what about the "apart from bikes" one i dredged. shit, it's taken off!

As has the Best Cycling Photos one
and the Welcome one, which had been in abeyance for months, causing new people to start new threads...

i remember that one from back when. my favourite more recent one is here

well worth checking. a little flavour of - " and strapped-on a pair of Grand Prix 4000 Continentals, in matching brown/black motif. With these GP's incredible 4000 strands straining under 120-PSI this bike is like a steel crowbar prying through the roadie crowds on the PCH. "

What a stupid place to put a bell - Might as well put it on the saddle...