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  • I got to the Shoreditch end of Hackney Road, approached a bus and there was a gamine, very pretty girl sat by the window. We made eye contact and she smiled. She was lovely, elfin, think Nicole Kidman in Birth:

    The lights were red so I pulled up next to her and put my hand out to lean on one of those crowd-control barriers on my left.

    It was loose.

    It was attached to anything. I started to topple and slowly tipped sideways and crashed to the ground. I was clipped in and scrabbling like a ladybird on its back. After about a year I managed to get up, face burning, the girl was looking straight ahead and her mouth was tense.

    We never did get married.

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