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@hanged_up
First job where I had to deal with customers, a guy came in to see my boss, I asked his name..
"Div"
"Div?"
"Yeah, Div."
"OK.." (restrain laughter, call boss who is downstairs) "Div here to see you.."
"Div?!"
"I don't know just come upstairs" (Div is glaring at me, I am red and tearful)
(Boss enters)
Boss: "Oh hi Dave"
He was Scottish.