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@user20714
Descending College Road in Dulwich, about 400m from the toll barrier, the combi van that had just overtaken me decided to suddenly swerve left and pull a u-turn back up the hill.
Cue locking up both brakes, fishtailing the back wheel, and using my shoulder to lean into the side of the van as I just about managed to stay upright.
Me: What the fuck are you doing?
Passenger: Get off the road!
Me: You nearly killed me!
Passenger: I didn't see you, I was on the phone
Me: But you weren't even driving!
Passenger: The driver's on the phone too!