For Sale: Foffa Single Speed Custom-built bicycle

It's just brilliant...

"I was just getting home from work when a neighbour ran up and said they had seen a wee ned shitting down the chimney... When I open the door the smell was incredible. The wee bastards's shite had landed in the grate, it was all over the place! It was all on the rug in front of the fire. There's no way it'll brush out. What the hell am i going to say to the insurance? Och, a ned shat down the chimney?"