Football

explain how he isn't a streaky scorer chalfie,
08/09 stretches of 4. 5. and 6 games without scoring
09/10 stretches of 4.4 and 5 games without scoring
10/11 stretches of 5.7 and 5 games without scoring
11/12 stretches of 3.4 and 3 games without scoring
12/13 stretches of 4.4.13 and 5 games without scoring.

He scores in bunches or he doesn't score at all.
Streaky?!?!

I choose to go back to this, like a dog to a bone, like a psoriasis patient and scratching a plaque, like trying to tell someone they're wrong on the internet. again.

Perhaps, the explanation is quite simple.
He scores against poor opposition, or when it was still possible for him to get a shot off without being found out by defenders, he then gets games based on this scoring of goals against shit defenders, he then plays against better quality defenders (or coaches who have said "watch that little defoe, crowd him when he shoots"), the fixture calendar then throws up a team he is capable of scoring against. He scores. Or gets injured.
He still takes too many shots, he still shoots from daft places, he still earns a lot of money for not a lot of product (comparatively). He's played approximately 10 seasons and has scored approximately 10 goals a season. He's never really troubled the scoring charts. He's pretty consistently average, and he shoots a lot. Or scores 5 goals against Wigan.