Sort-of memes that are cracking you up at the moment

We called our wifi network that a few years ago.

been there done that

My housemate's new gf made some weird noises during the sexy times. Very distracting waking up on a sunday morning, I politely asked him when her birthday was. He said October, I said he had until then to quiet the sex down or I bought her a ball gag. Not heard them since. Sadly now she thinks its acceptable to talk about their sex, it is not. I do not care, I just don't want to hear.

An old neighbour's wifi was called 'Im fisting yoda'. Oh, and I'll have that ball gag off you if it's going spare

I never really understood people complaining about sexy noises from neighbours or housemates. Jealousy? I imagine that if it was incessant my 'complaint' may not extend any further than pinning one of these to their door.

Tired. Read that as 'a neighbours old wife was caught fisting yoda.'

I never really understood people complaining about sexy noises from neighbours or housemates.

If I only lived next door to Rihanna...

I never really understood people complaining about sexy noises from neighbours or housemates. Jealousy? I imagine that if it was incessant my 'complaint' may not extend any further than pinning one of these to their door.

You've obviously never had neighbours fucking like raving maniacs for hours and hours at unsociable times on school nights.

I've had neighbours who I'd joyfully kill with a hammer simply because of their fuck noises.

Well, its not as bad as hearing your parent(s) at it, that's for sure.

I'm not sure they're interested in your love hammer

You've obviously never had neighbours fucking like raving maniacs for hours and hours at unsociable times on school nights.

I've had neighbours who I'd joyfully kill with a hammer simply because of their fuck noises.

In our last flat, the couple above us were students. So, not only did they have loud, enthusiastic, young persons' sex in all areas of their flat, it was at random times of the day (they obviously haven't learned that these things require a timetable or at least a three week lead time once you get to 30).

There was one particular day, about 11 o'clock, when my mother-in-law was visiting. I could hear the tell tale giggling and stumbling coming from upstairs so turned up the volume on radio 4 to drown out the forthcoming NNGGGHH-NNNGGHHH-HEE-HEE-HEE-NNNGGGHHH. However, this particular day's efforts were apparently quite athletic. So much so that the lampshade in the living room of our flat began to swing rhythmically. I noticed this, mrs_com noticed this, mrs_com noticed me noticing this, we both noticed each other panicking and hoping mrs_com_elder wouldn't notice this. Unfortunately she did, and just at the point when Nicholas Parsons decided it would be good time for Radio 4 to have some dead air. She sat watching the lamp shade move back and forth, listening to the 20-somethings from Flat D enjoying their pre-maritals, raised her eyebrows and said "huh, bloody animals....." before sipping her tea and changing the radio over to BBC 2.

Like I said

my ex housemate (and occasional fb) changed her bedroom around a bit so that the bed was perpendicular to the door, this meant that when she had a friend round not only could you hear major pounding noises, but both her door and the lounge door downstairs rattled wildly. Even to this day, rattles give me the horn.

rattles give me the horn.

Knock one yourself out

A female friend of mine discovered that her vibrator interfered with the TV reception in the shared house she was living in. Apparently it was some time before her housemates put two and two together, and worked up the courage to tell her of their suspicions.

I have no idea what sort of crazy vibrator would do this, but this is the story as told to me by her.

Probably peas but meh.

A female friend of mine discovered that her vibrator interfered with the TV reception in the shared house she was living in. Apparently it was some time before her housemates put two and two together, and worked up the courage to tell her of their suspicions.

I have no idea what sort of crazy vibrator would do this, but this is the story as told to me by her.

one operated by remote control?

Can u do that?

Whats the range?

I have no idea what sort of crazy vibrator would do this

Hitachi Magic Wand with a dodgy suppression capacitor

^^
About 20ft or so I've heard.

I used to have loud neighbours, more so during sexy time. I didn't mind too much except when they kept me awake going from midnight to 4am.

/csb

The only correct answer is to have better, louder sex.

With my family in the house, I'd rather not.

Why, you're all ugly?

No comment.

Knock one yourself out

Me and George Best, both shooting during a 60's football match...