Sort-of memes that are cracking you up at the moment

I was tripping on acid once, and.........

My mate was listening to his walkman in his bedroom once, had a wank, woke up....

he was wanking in his sleep...?

My mate...yeah right.

I once dropped a piece of toast and it landed butter side down but I picked it up and ate it anyway so fuck all of you.

he was wanking in his sleep...?
Billy Joel did it all the time.

he was wanking in his sleep...?

My mate...yeah right.

It's that old urban myth, don't you remember it from school

'My mate was on his bed listening to his walkman, eyes closed....got his cock out and had a toss
When he woke up there was a cup of tea at the side of his bed which his Mum had left for him'

Biggest load of cobblers but I must've heard that from about 20 different people*

*LIARS

Eightball, your avatar, I always see that as a cartoon version of Paul McCartney.

Is it?

I actually did this once, serious.

It's that old urban myth, don't you remember it from school

'My mate was on his bed listening to his walkman, eyes closed....got his cock out and had a toss
When he woke up there was a cup of tea at the side of his bed which his Mum had left for him'

Biggest load of cobblers but I must've heard that from about 20 different people*

*LIARS

House party on Deane Rd in Kensington, Liverpool. The album was by Cassius. It was incredibly embarrassing. FACT.

It's that old urban myth, don't you remember it from school

'My mate was on his bed listening to his walkman, eyes closed....got his cock out and had a toss
When he woke up there was a cup of tea at the side of his bed which his Mum had left for him'

Biggest load of cobblers but I must've heard that from about 20 different people*

*LIARS

I know this myth. I was being pedantic is all.

On the subject of urban myths I actually did something that is supposed to be an urban myth.

On a snowboard trip I had a bit of a row with a couple of cunts in the room next to ours (almost came to blows).. They left their room open when they went out so my mate and I snuck in. I shoved their tootbrushes up my arse and he took a picture of it with their camera which they left in the room..

Oh how I missed the days of proper film cameras and going to boots for your prints..

Pics?

Eightball, your avatar, I always see that as a cartoon version of Paul McCartney.

Is it?

It's a caricature of me someone did for a Fringe show I did a few years ago (in style of Furry Freak Brothers)

On the subject of urban myths I actually did something that is supposed to be an urban myth.

On a snowboard trip I had a bit of a row with a couple of cunts in the room next to ours (almost came to blows).. They left their room open when they went out so my mate and I snuck in. I shoved their tootbrushes up my arse and he took a picture of it with their camera which they left in the room..

Oh how I missed the days of proper film cameras and going to boots for your prints..

:-D

My mate did that when we were on football tour (toothbrush incident)

It was when who wants to be a Millionaire first started and was all the rage.

We were going to do an email in the style, with the picture and the question, who's toothbrush is this...

And then instead of phone a friend, it would have been phone Walshy (the owner of the arse)

haha

OOh Apple you're so original. Where DO you get your inspiration from? Oh, wait..

My design hero...

From...

oh ffs, here we go. You'll have to rule out a fuckload of products if you can't get on with companies copying others.

Adidas copy Nike with everything, always have

oh ffs, here we go. You'll have to rule out a fuckload of products if you can't get on with companies copying others.

But others don't seem to have done so, then sued the shit out of people for doing the same to them. They probably have, maybe for not as much money and forced products off the shelves.

On the subject of urban myths ..

Best story I ever heard.....

An English mate of a mate was wasted in a scottish pub.
Suddenly he had to vomitt massively
In the toilets he tried several cubical doors, untill one opened.
It was occupied though.
Still, the guy could'nt stop himself and throw up all over the poor bastard having a shite.
Then he remembered he was in a tough scottish pub, and drunken logic told him, things would get rough, thus he'd best get the first punch in.
So he smacked the guy shitting, and now socked in vomitt, in the nose as hard as he could, and ran off.

Probably means I'm a cnut. But I find that so funny.

Actually. Amazing.

Best story I ever heard.....

An English mate of a mate was wasted in a scottish pub.
Suddenly he had to vomitt massively
In the toilets he tried several cubical doors, untill one opened.
It was occupied though.
Still, the guy could'nt stop himself and throw up all over the poor bastard having a shite.
Then he remembered he was in a tough scottish pub, and drunken logic told him, things would get rough, thus he'd best get the first punch in.
So he smacked the guy shitting, and now socked in vomitt, in the nose as hard as he could, and ran off.

Probably means I'm a cnut. But I find that so funny.

Why were they in the ladies?