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@Linkpin
Bizarre interaction 1: Pulled up to a T-junction near the King's Road and stopped at the dashed lines to let a car and a bloke on a huge-framed MTB go past, when the cyclist suddenly stopped and called me a wanker. Somewhat surprised, I asked him to justify his bold claim (he's right, I am, but I've no idea how he knew). His shout of 'You weren't going to stop, you twat' did nothing to clear up my confusion since, by the time he saw me, I had already done so. Then he left.
Bizarre interaction 2: Riding across a roundabout in Tooting, I was sideswiped by a youngish lad on a silver singlespeed and only saved from tarmac rash by my ninja reflexes. I forced the guy to stop and explain his actions (he'd pulled out in front of me at my right of way). Apparently I had 'just appeared out of nowhere'. In fact, I had cycled along a straight piece of road leading up to the roundabout, wearing a bright red nodder jacket and without using any kind of teleportation device. Still, as I left to continue my journey he was still continuing to insist that I hadn't been there when he looked and that I must have been 'some kind of nutter to just appear like that'.
Possibly what I'm doing here is calling out people with mental illnesses rather than bad cyclists, in which case I apologise to them; if, however, they are of sound mind then I'd like to tell them to fuck off and confuse some other people for a change.