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@ArthurFrayn
1st post...
Stupidly driving with a plastic bag in my left hand, which then got caught in my front wheel. As the bag started hitting my front wheel, I was thinking "oh, shit", but by then it was too late. This resulted in me flying over the bars and landing an elegant belly flop in the middle of the street. Luckily no cars were nearby.
Looking for my friends in the park, I was driving over the grass and failed to spot a huge hole right in front of me, which then catapulted me over the bars. Did almost a full front flip and emerged unscathed, although it was fairly embarassing with lots of people around. To add to the embarassment, I then had to meet with people (I didn't really know everyone) with my left pant leg ripped to pieces near "the crouchal region", awesome.
Trying to get off my bike in front of a green grocer. My left foot got stuck in the strap, I then toppled over, knocking down a box of oranges in the process, which were rolling all over the place. As I was lying on my back on the street amidst the oranges, some guy was walking by looking down at me. He didn't even smile, laugh or say anything, just looked at me like "wtf are you doing?!". I think this finally confirmed to me that germans have no humor :).
This all happened on my singlespeed and was entirely my own fault. I can only image what will happen when I finish my fixed gear one of these days...