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@1894mk2
Name your own sportive and attach the alliterative marketing hyperbole. For the technicaly able add a Wigglesque logo thingy.
eg
The Hills Have Eyes Sportive
Veloterrible are pleased to announce ,in association with the League Against Cruel Sports, the incorporation of this gruelling new sportive in the 2012 events calender. Located amongst the isolated incestuous and firearms laden rural hamlets of Exmoor and timed to coincide with harvest, this closed roads event aims to teach local people the benefits of cycling to their economy.
etc