The Times Cycling Campaign

Sadly I can see myself voting Green in the Mayoral elections, something I never thought I would find myself doing. I refuse, however, to wear sandals or grow a beard.

You can start by taking after me and growing your hair long, Clive. Everything else will naturally fall into place. And, of course, the forum is all abuzz with the burning question of whether you could even grow a beard. We doubt it and we want embarrassing pictures from your misspent youth to prove us wrong.