Argh! Help! Parents!

I looked up 'shan' on urban dictionary to see if this was a new slang word that the kids are using.

1. Leave your bike hidden behind your mum's car - when she drives to work, she'll run it over and feel awful and buy you another one.
   
2. Arrive home carrying your wheels and handlebars and say that some bigger boys/hip hop slaves took your frame.
   
3. Donate your frame to an African cycling charity. Explain that you couldn't donate your wheels as they would rotate the wrong way if used in the southern hemisphere.
   
4. Explain that because your parents are too stingy to buy a water-filter, the hard water you used to wash your pride and joy resulted in terminal rust.
   
5. Say you are allergic to your current frame. Women are often allergic to the metals in their jewelry so your mum will sympathise with this. You'll need a Reynolds 953 frame as the stainless steel is medical grade, and the silver solder is nonreactive.
   
6. Feign a growth spurt.
   7.