The 'good date ideas' thread

Just got mine back from B&D. Thanks mate although I'm still unsure about the last bit.

I'm putting out a world wide web bulletin to get everyone's help. You see, I've lost my smile. I'm not really myself without it. I have a couple leads that give me hope that it may have been found, including a vague description. She appears to be between 26 and 40 years old, but may appear younger than her age. She at least 5'4" (I am 5'9"), not a bbw, but doesn't live at the gym either. She has high-maintenance looks with a down-to-earth attitude, values, and personality. She loves rock & roll and may be found at concerts. I have conflicting reports that she's either a blonde or a brunette. She's intelligent with her own career and not dependent on someone to support her. If this person can be found, I can offer a reward of lifetime devotion, long, slow kisses that last for days, midnight massages, a partner that loves to cook and doesn't mind sharing in the household chores, someone to wash your back, a shoulder to lean on, and someone who will hold you at night. If you think you may have found my smile, please e-mail me as I really need it to be myself. Thanks.
Oh and she looks a little like this

Fuck....stuff of nightmares

B&D should hand over the least favourite peoples profile writing to others on the forum

I would piss myself reading ones written by general lucifer, pistanator, edscoble

also each time someone has success they need to change their avatar to the edscoble gif

this should be their payment

They would be no more entertaining than yours...

Define success....

When they no longer need their BD penned profile then can it be posted here?

I like to put it out there right from the start.

Release the crazy slowly....or just put it out there?

Well, at the moment my virginity has grown back so I'm super innocent.

If you've not taken my lovely mate lauren for a drink yet, then you deserve to be eternally single.

Not so sure how you friend Lauren will take it that you think him maintaining his innocence and taking her for a drink are mutually exclusive.

If you've not taken my lovely mate lauren for a drink yet, then you deserve to be eternally single.

Ah! I forgot that we were supposed to hook up after new yrs. my bad!

chainbreaker in forgetting to call a girl shocker

Do I normally forget? I don't remember...

When you arrive for said date, please don't stick your tongue in her ear.

Unless she asks you to.

She's is a very good looking and lovely lady Ian..... dogsballs even said he would when I saw him this week. You be nice now.

If you've not taken my lovely mate lauren for a drink yet, then you deserve to be eternally single.

same goes for my lovely mate petia. tsk tsk.

If you don't have a date lined up yet, and you're a bit of an exhibitionist, there's always this...

http://london.craigslist.co.uk/tfr/2788483073.html

A friend sent me the link, obviously....

same goes for my lovely mate petia. tsk tsk.

Who?!?!

Are you talking to me?!

Ive never met your friend Petia.

All these lovely mates going spare. Tsk, tsk.

Who?!?!

Are you talking to me?!

Ive never met your friend Petia.

My friend Petia.

Yes.

No you haven't but I've suggested setting you and her up twice.

Who?!?!

Are you talking to me?!

Ive never met your friend Petia.

My friend Petia.

Yes.

No you haven't but I've suggested setting you and her up twice.

tsk, tsk

My friend Petia.

Yes.

No you haven't but I've suggested setting you and her up twice.

My friend Petia.

Yes.

No you haven't but I've suggested setting you and her up twice.

tsk, tsk

And you clearly had to post twice just to drive home the point. :)

Iain is a douchebag >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Iain's definition of a douchebag is sticking his tongue in various peoples' ears.

the fuck is this???

You skip the country and suddenly there's a surplus of single women.

Heh... you say all the right things, wvm.

Seeing as this thread has become a matchmaking service, perhaps someone can fix me up with one of thier desparate mates? In case you don't know me, M, 29, a bit fat, pretty ugly, SSOH, and a terrible drunk. Thx.