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@adroit
Here are a couple of bodges I have used before:-
how is the crank held on? a nut or a bolt?
If a bolt get an allen key one and screw it in to the axle, then get a self extractor ( a washer that is common on modern ish cranks, hollowtech 2 for example but there are others, your LBS probably have some knocking about the workshop) which should screw in to the threads (but not securely if the threads have gone, you just need to get it into place).
Then get some metal epoxy, I got some really fast setting stuff from B&Q for about £4, and use that to secure the self extractor. If the threads are really toast and you have access to a drill drill a couple of holes into the crank so that you and screw in a couple of self tapping screws to hold the self extractor before using the epoxy. The crank will be toast now!
Make sure it is all free of oil and grease, and you can still get the allen key into the bolt.
Then leave the bike a while, preferably outside, so it goes cold, and the epoxy has set rock solid .
Now pour boiling water over the crank and immediately unscrew the bolt with an (8mm) allen key. This will pull the crank off.
Sounds complicated but it isn't really, and it works pretty well.
If the crank is held on with a nut and you have an old pre cartridge bottom bracket then remove the drive side crank and the drive side BB cup. The axle will now be loose in the frame. Loosen the nut on the non drive side axle a couple of turns, put a socket (usually 14mm) on it and with the frame suitably supported hammer the socket to push the axle through the crank. Pouring hot water on helps here too.