This is not news

Ha!

Substitute "bigot" for "Jehovah" in that Life of Brian sketch.

this is definitely not news:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8652837.stm

this is definitely not news:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8652837.stm

a lot more interesting than the election campaign though....

when he sits up its like something from 28 days later / any generic zombie/parnormal goings on movie.

I read that and thought exactly the same thing. It's just bollocks.

I suppose at a stretch you could see it as 'cultural reporting' but I think that's a big stretch.

this is definitely not news:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8652837.stm

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html

Top notch reporting from The Sun, as always.

a lot more interesting than the election campaign though....

Satirical

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html

Top notch reporting from The Sun, as always.

I cant beleve I just laughed out load at a story of a man duying.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html

Top notch reporting from The Sun, as always.

"The eel devoured his bowels."
Eeuww.

The eel couldn't believe its luck

Poor chef, he got a bum deal.

Some brand new shit news reporting from the BBC website . . . . (I mean, just read the 'report', take a look at the fucking picture !?)

I could be a journalist if this is all you need to do.

"Something happened today in Sheffield say police. Police say something happened today in Sheffield and that they are going to "look into it" Police say it happened in the Hallam area of Sheffield. "Our enquiries are ongoing" said a police spokesman speaking about the incident in the Hallam area of Sheffield today.

[insert random picture]

You misunderstood the article, Tynan.

There was an actual car (possibly not local - foreign?) in the cul-de-sac.
It used to be such a quiet place where local people minded their own business.

You misunderstood the article, Tynan.

There was an actual car (possibly not local - foreign?) in the cul-de-sac.
It used to be such a quiet place where local people minded their own business.

I missed that bit where they said there was a car involved in the car accident, it all makes sense now, I reckon it was the car.

And they laughed at Nick Griffin when he said we should close the borders.

This country was betrayed by those secret lefties - Cameron & Clegg.

They're really just publishing the news too soon, before they have got a proper report together. There'll undoubtedly be a follow-up later with more detail in it.

There's enough details - car, child, cul-de-sac, accident. Must be a freak one. There are some cul-de-sacs where person with too deep tan would be branded a terrorist.

Yeah, Oliver, what do you want ? Details ? Details of the freak accident ?

You ghoulish freak.

Yeah, Oliver, what do you want ? Details ? Details of the freak accident ?

You ghoulish freak.

I'm not a goulash freak, I'm vegan. Do your research properly. You have to read the posts you're responding to carefully.

tynan, maybe it's a good thing that there's no much speculation going on in that news, for example when the tube bombing occur in 2005, lots of news organisation (especially the american one), reported a speculated amount of 'death', I recall seeing 'at least 700 death', ' 300 reported killed' etc. while the BBC I remember very clearly just said 'report pending', and eventually '26 death so far' before it reach to the final number - 52 deaths.

Cold hard facts. Nothing more, nothing less...

Last night Graham Norton passed away, he will be sadly missed.
#fact

This thread will not go well. FACT!

i am bacon free