Ways not to lock your bike

Just back from sunny Balham high street - the Sainsbury's there recently did a refit during which they took away the several excellent sheffield stands and replaced them with a single shed containing maybe 6 of those idiotic butterfy stands. This evidently didn't do enough to discourage cyclists from locking up at Sainsbury's, so now they've taken the shed / butterfly stands away and replaced them with two tree-shaped structures with grooves in the stems. I gather you are supposed to lift your bike into the stands vertically and use a cable lock to secure your quick-release front wheel to the topmost metal bar of the stand. There doesn't appear to be any method using standard physics by which you can both secure the wheel to the stand and secure the wheel to the bicycle.

Two enterprising souls had a go anyway, everybody else just locked their bikes to the wooden railings that fence off the flowerbeds. Why do Sainsbury's hate cyclists?

I've been meaning to post a photo of this for a while. I don't think people would believe how staggeringly full of fail these things are without seeing them.

You can already see a severed cable dangling on there.