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@Khornight2
This is like the perfect response, thank you all ever so much you may have just saved my relationship!
Although I am confussed, I was mentally preparing for an avalanche of abuse/sarcasm/jokes and memes.... Now they've not here I feel a bit like I'm missing out!
Confusion aside, thanks, even if I buy the speedo one now and the bone vibrating one later I looks better! :)
I'm also surprised no one else has chimed in with other things they are looking for? Or is it just swimming equipment that esoteric enough to need this thread? Or every is sensible and did their Christmas shopping in the January sales last year! :)