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@deleted
Pretty sure you all know this bike, or at least know what a 'roller looks like but here's another pic anyway, bit more detailed than the others but obviously different bars.
I had a thought Fin, if it was a drunken opportunist thief, ie someone intending to simply nick a ride home, then you may be right that they dumped it and it could be in bushes somewhere in Cannon Hill Park.
Have you made flyers yet for the campuses? I'm in (with LS) to hit spots up.
If you're building a hack let us all know, we can start a freecycle thread, I have some bits.