101 wankers

On a sit up and beg bike, I was plenty tall enough to hit his roof. I sped up, whacked his roof, but also his aerial, which to my surprise came clean off in my hand. I wasn’t about to apologise, or let him jump out of the car, so I hopped onto the pavement, cycled to the edge of the bridge, threw it into the river and looked back at the car, before beating a hasty exit.

Hahah.

I meet a BMW in london bridge the other day. I was pulling away from the lights which just turned green when i felt some scraping on my rear tyre. This grew more pained whenceupon i felt a slight tapping on the back of my right heal. I look down and see the front bumper of a black BMW almost pushing me along at this point. I shit myself and speed up out of his grasp, look round and stare at the driver, who I now notice is looking in his lap and texting. He is also indicating right for no reason.

I was more dumbstruck than angry and just made a WTF gesture at the prick, who didn't notice me until his passenger, who was well aware, began shouting at me making that "look where you're going" sign language.

Brilliant