Android phones, apps and tablets

How do I open Talk?

The only way I can get to it is opening a browser and going to Selecting the talk tab
m.google.com

Even then you can't enter a status
Does it actualy work for you?

Select enter a custom message and it doesnt enter anything
Select one of your saved mesages it doesnt change.
Even if it did work it would be a fiddling job.

Fail google - fail hippy

Are you joking?
Wait what phone do you have? Isn't Talk in your app list? It's standard, no?