Fixing Punctures / Puncture Repair / Exploding Tubes

I'm sure there are people we can find you in order to help you cope with this shocking revelation. www.theypickonmypatchingtechniquesupportline.com

I swap tubes when out on the road and repair punctures at home so I'm faster than you anyway.

Of course you are; you know everything there is to know, and are more accomplished in all aspects.

You'd have to repair them at home, given how much time you waste ficking about with a task so quick and simple that even a complete retard can have it done in seconds. Probably pop them on the radiator overnight to make sure the fix is "durable" no doubt.