Is your spouse/partner bike-curious?

We frequently get asked by riders how to get their bike-curious partners/spouses into biking, and I normally waffle about the Zen joy of fixicating and getting trained to ride in traffic, but there are finer more creative minds here with better ideas I'm sure.....

so glad you have got ke on that thread

my cycle addiction is pretty much what destroyed my last relationship. hah.

so glad you have got ke on that thread

So sad you got ke on that thread.

My good lady only took an interest so we could go for rides as a family. She enjoys it but will never really be that arsed about it, however she is starting to do more and is slowly increasing the mileage.

I like that she doesn't want to come with me all the time.

my cycle addiction is pretty much what destroyed my last relationship. hah.

snap!

I like that she doesn't want to come with me all the time.

Then again, no...too easy...

Listen to what they are actually saying rather than what you want them to be saying. They will develop their own tastes and preferences as their bike experience moves on and they gain more confidence and discernment. That said you may never be into the same style of bikes, or bike riding.
I had one partner who was extremely critical of my attempts (some successes, some failures) to build/ convert/ customise my own bikes. Plus he kept swapping bits over on them when I wasn't looking. It was immensely irritating and he denied me the opportunity to make my own judgment calls on stuff. And that's many people's ideal situation of your gf building fixed track bikes with her own toolkit in the front room.

Basically, don't be a pompous arse. Listen, stand back, assist when asked.

^^^sound advice right there^^^^^

Listen to what they are actually saying rather than what you want them to be saying. Listen, stand back, assist when asked.

cheers - wisdom just when i need it.
lovely gf starting commuting this summer on 20 odd kilos of hybrid, insisting from the outset that my input would not be kindly received. she's now starting to ask questions about the benefits of "skinny bikes" and i know that any second i'm going to let loose a deluge of over-selling, pontificating and too much detail, all from a distastefully partisan position (tautology).
read your post and may now have the fortitude to stop myself from dragging her down to condor to get measured up. she'll figure stuff out for herself.

I successfully converted my better half, she now has more bikes than me and rides daily. :D
One thing I've noticed: it is blatant that drivers are better cyclists as they understand the capabilities of vehicles, rules of the road and reflexes. So since she isn't a driver, I was a little worried at first, some incidents and close calls did happen but she has made tremendous progress.

I strongly advise to spend time discussing (not about bikes, about riding!), riding, maintaining together as you can point things out in real case situations as a witness, she is much more likely to accept that she was in the wrong in a given situation. Also cycle in front of her (slowly) so she can observe you and not feel pressured under your scrutiny. And build her a bike to her specs, costs less than jewelery and she'll be happy riding her gift everyday (or hate you because it's not working properly)

Sadly, she doesn't share my temptation for a tandem (yet), and she prefers singlespeed (for now). No pressure...

Mrs ROOG’s bike is firmly strapped into the Turbo in the shed, she does thousands of miles a year going nowhere! When I do get her out on her bike, usually on holidays, she finds the roads/lanes too intimidating.

I’m currently getting the daggers by my mates wife for getting him interested in bikes/cycling, his wife can’t understand what’s got into him!

Mrs ROOG’s bike is firmly strapped into the Turbo in the shed, she does thousands of miles a year going nowhere! When I do get her out on her bike, usually on holidays, she finds the roads/lanes too intimidating.

If your wife find the road/lanes too intimidating, you could always suggested cycle training as this is the best way to get her to feel confident and secure on the road, it would make a huge difference and you two will be able to go out on the road more often.

Brompton - the best way to learn how to ride a bike.

I don't know why small wheeled bicycle are easier to learn, when the missus got her first one, she rode it like a pro easily, whether on my mum old dutch bike, she had a hard time maintaining balance and the like.

The other thing - build her a bicycle, especially in her favourite colour and look appealing to her, work massively as it got her riding it everyday in utter delight.

And then eventually she get more confident and comfortable and now she have an old english track bike with coaster brake for fun.

i sometimes try to inspire my gf with a love of cycling but she remains doubtful

Was the cap the inspiration?

I think I messed it up by trying to get my girlfriend to ride ill fitting cast offs of mine, I've just finished restoring an old Raleigh Transit which fits well and she loves it.....gotta sort out some cycle training though,she scares the life out of me on the roads

best thing is to make cycling fun and social. that's how i'm slowly converting my gf to cycling. a gentle pootle around the park every now and again is a very good start. not too fast, not too risky, and ice cream / coffee / pastries / sex (delete as appropriate) afterwards. She's not a confident cyclist, even in the park, so that in itself was a big hurdle to get over.

I also fixed up a bike for her to ride focussing more on what kind of bike she'd like to ride, rather than what i'd like her to ride.

Was the cap the inspiration?

yes -

Oh yes, one very important advice;

NEVER leave your missus standing when jumping a red light/getting ahead of yourself, that's the most cuntest behaviour you'll ever do and I kept seeing it quite regularly with bloke on their fixie skidder and their missus wobble on their similarily build bike/shopper.

@ matt_ha : looks like she's decided that she likes bikes personally, rather than just as a couple-y activity; best possible outcome!
well done for maintaining self-restraint :)

Most of these posts do refer to men getting women into riding. I don't know what the average woman's experience is but I do remember most girls of my age learning to ride a bike the same way as the boys. So it might not be about learning from scratch!
I don't know if the type of bike, or bike riding experience from that age can affect what she feels comfortable doing now... I started on bmx, so getting on a hybrid or dutch bike in adult life would seem as alien to me as perhaps a diamond frame or racer does to others.

my girlfriend point blank refuses to go cycling with me. She uses the excuse 'I will leave you to have your boy time on your boy transportation'.

Most of these posts do refer to men getting women into riding. I don't know what the average woman's experience is but I do remember most girls of my age learning to ride a bike the same way as the boys. So it might not be about learning from scratch!

Yes, research generally shows that there's a massive drop-off in cycling once children hit their teenage years, across both genders, but more so among girls than boys. The causes are the usual suspects--gender stereotyping etc. (However, of course, very few boys cycle through their adolescence to adulthood in this country, too--for them, a different kind of gender stereotype kicks in, although apparently not as strongly.)

My Mrs. said she doesn't mind cycling when the weathers nice. I wouldn't ever force her into it and wouldn't be one of the people who'd go all out on her first bike either. If she decides to cycle to work that's cool, I cycle all year and we live near her work so she can walk.

Oh and Jeez - spot on with the shared interests thing, don't live in each others pockets. We both share interests but like doing our own things as well.

Yes, research generally shows that there's a massive drop-off in cycling once children hit their teenage years, across both genders, but more so among girls than boys. The causes are the usual suspects--gender stereotyping etc. (However, of course, very few boys cycle through their adolescence to adulthood in this country, too--for them, a different kind of gender stereotype kicks in, although apparently not as strongly.)

funny that, i stopped cycling for a couple of years after uni. i didn't even realise cycling was something i "did" until i came back to it later.